Caution: Use the Drive-Through

I love Taco Bueno. It's possible I could eat it everyday if it were a health food (which it clearly is not.) Since being pregnant, I've decided to put some boundaries in place that will stop me from eating my ever-increasing-weight in beef chilada platters. I will only allow myself to eat Taco Bueno AFTER a doctor's visit and only if I've kept the weight gain in a very respectable range.

Today was my big day. Following my 1pm doctor's visit I nearly ran to my car to rush over to Broadway & 2nd Street -- location of my favorite Bueno. I skipped the drive through because sometimes it's really not faster... Inside I placed my order (and ordered a little "snack" for the kids because I didn't intend to share even one chip with them - NOT ONE!)

A rowdy looking red-headed twenty-something guy walked in and took his place at the counter while I waited for my order to be filled. He overheard a spanish-speaking worker in the back and decided to show off for me. Rattling off what was obviously "text-book" espanol, he tried to communicate with the worker. Spare me... Turning to me he shot me a wink and an "I'm so incredibly cool with my hole-y t-shirt and bilingual sex appeal" look. Does he not notice I'm pregnant? (and violently hungry?!) Which of those two things is attractive to someone at least ten years younger than me?

Perhaps it's because I didn't swoon over his display of multi-culturalism that he took it to the next step. "I just told that guy I'm dangerous...in Spanish." Pal, I'm dangerous, and I won't cloak the message in a foreign language.

"It's hot out today." Thank you, David Payne for the obvious commentary.

"That's why I moved from Phoenix back to Oklahoma--to get away from the heat." Logical choice to escape summertime heat? Where is my food?

"Do you know Spanish? I can speak it awesome but I can't understand what they're saying...Did you understand what I told him? Wasn't that funny?" No. You don't say?..., No. Not in the least.

"Yeah, I was in a [censored] rock band out there but I couldn't take the heat." No you weren't. And I can't take this any longer. Please! Just slap on some sour cream and let's get going!

"We had record deals and contracts and everything but it wasn't worth it man." No you didn't. And I'm beginning to think Bueno isn't worth it. Forget the salsa. I want my order!

The spanish worker apparently wanted to help this guy's chances of picking up on a pregnant-obviously-not-interested-thirty-something-woman by making his order first and faking his elite status at the Bueno. Whatever.

He got his first and left me with "See ya round." Most likely you won't.

I checked my order only to discover it was actually HIS order and he had escaped with my precious chilada platter! I alerted the worker of the situation and waited patiently for mine to be redone. In the meantime...Rocker Rick comes back on the scene a few minutes later and says, "Gal, this must be yours. I opened up the chips and then remembered [heh, heh, heh] I didn't order any." And hands it to me. The worker looks at me from behind the counter as if to encourage me to take his sack and exit the restaurant happy. I offered her a look that politely (seriously, politely) "encouraged" her to simply start over on my sack of calories.

After fifteen minutes in Taco Bueno I finally left with the prize. I ate every bite. Then I vowed not to abuse my body again until July 19 after the next weigh in. And next time I will use the drive-through.