Deliberate Hope

We Don't Do That Here.

2012-01-26T13:04:00.001-06:00

My son's 6th grade leadership teacher uses that phrase with her students. I found this out when I stuck my spoon (uninvited) into the bowl of ice cream Kid Two was scooping out for himself.

He shot me a look and recited with confidence (or was it sarcasm?), "Um, we don't do that here." I apologized (but I wasn't entirely sorry. Come on, it was chocolate chip ice cream!) It was a simple statement that let me know his position without question. His mind had already been made up. His 'matter of fact' response confirmed he wasn't putting up with any shenanigans. Apparently 'we' don't take ice cream from another family member without asking. who knew.

This morning when I was wrestling in prayer about a thing or two, the enemy started in on me. Familiar lies that I so easily believe, making me feel less than God says I am, and trying to convince me I'm never going to live up to what God has called me to do -- I was letting him take my ice cream without asking.

I interrupted his condemnation. "Um, excuse me, we don't do that here." I told him with confidence. I stopped the voice that was trying to weaken me because the facts say I belong to the Father. And the voice that condemns me belongs to the enemy.

I refused to listen any longer. He has no audience here.
We won't sheepishly believe we won't measure up.
We won't walk in guilt because we fall short from time to time.
We won't give up the pursuit because it's work.
Sorry, we don't do that here.

An Open Letter to My Dryer

2012-01-23T14:53:00.002-06:00

Dear Dryer,

I think it's time we had a talk. You've been hanging around my laundry room for quite a while, getting all warm and cozy with the washer every Friday night. Lately I've noticed things I don't like. And since I try not to complain about what I tolerate, it's time I confront you.

Let me put it this way...You're in trouble. I'm thinking of letting you go.

You used to be so available to me, you were hot and efficient. Now, you're lazy and bi-polar. Oh sure, you start right up without a fuss but half the time you don't even get warm, just tumbling my clothes around for 37 minutes without changing anything. You're like the kid who runs the bathwater but never gets in and then promises his mother he is clean. You're tricky. I turned the heat up, thinking you might just be cold. I know, it's winter and all. But seriously, you showed me, didn't you?! Burning your marks on the side of my favorite stretchy pants? You've caused me to take my weekend grungy/comfortable clothes to a whole new level of tacky.

Dryer, you're wasting space in my utility room. You look good but you're not effective. You're not consistent and quite frankly, you are doing more harm than good. That's not why I bought you. Today I had to load up 5 loads of wet laundry and go the local laundromat. And.that.was.not.fun.with.two.small.kids.

There is work to be done and I chose you to do it. But if you won't dry for me, I'll find one that will. You're not bringing honor to your name, Dryer.

Sincerely,
The House Management

Father, may I not be like my fickle dryer! Lead me to be more effective for your kingdom. You have given all of us a part in bringing glory to your name. May I not take that lightly but strive to see Your purpose fulfilled in my life. Amen.

And Lord, if you could heal that dryer that would be just dandy...

People from the past

2012-01-09T16:18:00.000-06:00

I'm not nostalic by nature. I don't have a single high school year book left in my possession or any pictures from the prom or gradutation. I don't regularly get hung up on the past. I do, however, find myself thinking of people who were important to me throughout life -- like my grandpa or my favorite elementary school teacher. Precious memories of people are tucked away in my heart.

This weekend I was blessed to see several people who significantly impacted my life when I was growing up. They probably don't even know the extent to which I looked up to them. My parents celebrated their 25th anniversary with friends from all seasons of their life and it was a joy to honor them among family and friends.

Four ladies in particular were in attendance. They were the "moms" when I was a teenager. They were everything from my Sunday School teachers to my friends' moms to the mother of the boy I once chased in youth group.

My sister and I reminisced about our memories with those ladies and how they had touched our lives in one way or another, probably without knowing it. And I'll admit, it was a little humbling to realize I am probably older now than they were during those times! Yikes!

Driving home I was a little quiet. "What are you thinking about?" someone asked in the car.

"I'm remembering all those people from years ago when I was a kid." But inside my brain it was more than that. I was thinking about my own children and their friends. I was planning to be intentional about making an impact on their friends. They probably won't remember what a fabulous snack maker I was (and I am) or how you could often grow a garden from the dirt on my kitchen floor (this is true)! But I hope someday when they are grown up, they remember they had a friend who's mother loved the things of God and her sons were different kids because of it. Maybe, just maybe, it will make a difference to them 25 years later.

Ladies, you know who you are, thank you for the influence you had.

30 Days of Family...Are you still with us?! (Day 10-12)

2011-11-27T16:13:00.001-06:00

Day 1-3 | Day 4-6 | Day 7-9

Day 10: My Kids Are So Cool, I Shared Them...

Okay, I know this is 30 Days of Family...and just as I suspected, we fell behind a little and had to change plans. The Foxy Mr and I left town for a day before the sun came up and didn't come home until late. I can't tell you what we were up to because it involves a family Christmas gift and I intend to keep it a secret until the right time. SO, I "shared" my kids with their aunt and uncle. :) Sharing is Biblical, right? I did call them a time or two so technically, no family interaction was lost. #human.

Day 11: Birthdays Everywhere!

There are 4 family birthdays within one week. Three of us live in town. We'll host a family birthday get together and enjoy the company of our family. No TV, no ipods, no video games. Just all of us gathered around the table to eat, laugh, eat, exchange gifts, and eat.

Day 12: Christmas Carol Charades

Kid 2 is in a vocal music program tonight. We will all go together and then come home to a late dinner. After dinner, our family activity will be Christmas Carol Charades to keep the musical spirit going. Put 10-12 song titles in a bowl. The "actor" has 2 minutes to act out the song title. If it is guessed accurately, the "guessor" gets 3 points and the "actor" gets 5. We'll play 2-3 rounds as long as the attitudes are still good...

Spiritual application: Think about acting... It's pretending to be someone you're not. Can you think of a situation in which you 'act' like a follower of Christ but on the inside you know it's just a game you're playing? How can we be real so that others see the light of Christ in us instead of a facade?

30 Days of Family (Day 7-9)

2011-11-27T06:00:00.000-06:00

Days 1-3 | Days 4-6

Our month of intentional family time continues. See the last two posts for other ideas...

Day 7: Show and Tell

Ask each family member to bring an object to the table that represents something for which they are thankful. So help me, if one of my kids brings the XBox downstairs they won't see the light of day until January! (Can you guess that I'm over the video game thing?!) Let others guess what the object represents. Then each person tells. It's better than everyone just 'saying' it. This requires more thought. I'm going to leave pictures of me conveniently scattered around the house in hopes that someone will bring my pic to the table... :)

Spiritual Application / Discussion: What are the good things for which we are thankful? Are there any things that are not so good to be thankful for? (problems, trials, etc.) How can we be thankful IN all things?

Day 8: Kid Pick: Grab Bag!

One of my boys is in charge of tonight's activity. He has a $20 budget. The only rule is that he must provide some short spiritual application or discussion question and it must involve all family members. (No leaving a brother home because he is annoying!) I have no idea what he is planning...

Day 9: Special Breakfast

If we are still tracking according to plan, my husband and I will be going out of town on this day. Our event will have to be an early one before the guys go to school. We'll enjoy a big family breakfast - something we don't do during the weekday since everyone gets up at different times and leaves early! I'm thinking French Toast Casserole might be on the menu that day.

Spiritual Application / Discussion: I'm just going to ask the boys how I can pray for them on this day. :)

Our fun will continue.

I wonder if by the time this post is published if I will still think this whole 30 Day thing was a good idea?...

30 Days of Family ... continues (Day 4-6)

2011-11-24T06:00:00.000-06:00

If you missed how this all started, go here. (Day 1-3)

I'm going to let you in our plans a few days ahead of time. I've heard a few of you are going to join us for 30 Days of Family: Doing Stuff Together Whether We Like It or Not so you might want a little heads up on the events.

Day 4: Christmas Quiz

How well do you know the Christmas Story? You might be surprised! Download this Christmas quiz and test your knowledge of the facts as recorded in the Bible.

Spiritual Application / Discussion: If we base our beliefs only on what has been taught to us or what we've heard, we may find out we are missing out on some important truths. Did any of the questions surprise you? How does the story in the Bible compare to what traditions tell us? If we want to know the truth, we must go directly to the source.

Day 5: Puzzle
We're putting a 550 piece jigsaw puzzle on the dining room table. Throughout the month when there's nothign else to do, or maybe for a few minutes after dinner, we will sit down to work on the puzzle. It could be all of us or just a few at a time. This is an unscheduled event but gives an alternative to TV or video games. Plus, you get to talk to each other while you bicker over who gets to work the best part of the puzzle. (For added frustration, hide the box so no one knows what it will be in the end...)

Spiritual Application / Discussion: This puzzle at first glance is a mess. We can't even see what the end is going to look like! One thing we DO know: All these pieces fit together to make a picture, whole and complete. Our life is like that. Romans 8:28 says God works all things together... Our life is a puzzle and in the end it will be more than a jumbled mess of pieces!

Day 6: Hot Chocolate Buffet

Buy a few things that would be tasty (and interesting) in hot chocolate...peppermint, marshmallows, peanut butter chips! Each family member makes a special cup of hot chocolate to enjoy using some (or all) of the ingredients. We might take our chocolately drinks outside by the chiminea and enjoy some conversation.

Spiritual Application / Discussion: Everyone's hot chocolate is different because of what we put into them. Some of us made a great cup and others are just "okay." Our lives are the same. Did you realize the "things" we put into our minds shape who we are? What things do we put in our lives that are good? Bad? What makes people want more of us?

Our 30 Days of Family events are not expensive or fussy. It's all about being intentional. A few minutes a day can go a loooooong way!

"30 Days of Family" Kicks Off! (Day 1-3)

2011-11-22T10:35:00.001-06:00

This holiday season will be different.
And it's yet to be determined if that is a good thing...or a bad thing.

Last week I announced to my family we would be stepping up the efforts to make our family time a priority. You can imagine the cheers and applause I received from the Bigs, who already complain we spend more time together than most families. They'll thank me someday. Won't they?!

I'm calling it 30 Days of Family...Doing stuff together whether we like it or not. The title is fitting, trust me. And I'm willing to admit it may be February when we finally finish our 30 days. I'm packing light for that guilt trip. Each day we will do some activity together -- it may be something big, or something very small. And because I believe we should never waste an opportunity to impart spiritual truths to our kids, someone in the group will be in charge of sharing a scripture or applying spiritual application to the event.

Starting this Thanksgiving when countless turkeys give their lives to usher in the busiest and most commercial season of the year, our team of 6 will make an effort to be intentional about growing our family.

Let's just hope this is half as good in real life as it is in my head. Actually, I'd settle for a quarter as good. :)

DAY 1: Thanksgiving
Spending time with the ones we love most. Psalm 107:1 - Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; his love endures forever.

DAY 2: Family outing to Dry Gulch
This is a retreat center originally constructed to be an Old West movie set. Outfitted for the Christmas season, visitors experience a great display of lights, food and holiday festivities. The narrow gauge locomotive train ride features a display of the story of Christ's birth and presents the gospel to visitors. Check it out here.

Day 3: Prepare the house for the holiday season
We'll dig out decorations and put up lights, getting the house ready for December. We'll talk about what we can do to prepare our hearts for Jesus. The decorations and preparations for Christmas are fun but I want them to remember the real effort should be made in our hearts to prepare for Jesus. We must be about the business of pursuing holiness -- conforming to the character of Christ, rather than the business of presents.

Check back for our family time activities!

A new twist on Apple Smiles

2011-10-13T08:47:00.000-05:00

Two things I love: Food and the Word of God.

I am always looking for ways to make scripture "sticky" for my kids, making it easy to hide the truth in their hearts so they will remember. When I came across a creative snack on Pinterest, I immediately knew how I could satisfy a craving for two of my favorite loves in one family activity!

We made these adorable smiles while talking about the words we use and the things that come out of our mouths.

All you need is a red apple, marshmallows and peanut butter! There are tons of scripture to tie in with this activity. Kid Three is currently learning a couple that fit nicely:

Eph 4:29 - "Do not let any ugly or bad words come out of your mouth...use words that are nice." (toddler version, of course)

Ps 118:24 - "This is the day the Lord has made. We will rejoice and be glad!"

Kid Three recited his verse each time he put a "tooth" into the mouth. (Must have been a shark mouth...rows of teeth?!)

For my older kids, I'll use something different. They already know those two verses. I'll take it a little deeper with them and use this little "snack" to remind them of the power of their words and the influence they have in their circle of friends.

We won't eat a red apple anytime soon without thinking of this activity and the scripture associated. Mission accomplished!

I'm banking on the little things they will remember when they leave home -- and looking forward to the day when my grandkids bring me a plate of Apple Smiles they made with their dad.

What's in the well comes up in the bucket.

Give THIS to Single Mother's for Father's Day

2011-05-13T14:23:00.003-05:00

Have you ever thought of that? What do single moms want for Father's Day?

I thought about it. For at least 5 years in a row. Once upon a time, I was a single mom.

I've prepared my tornado "fraidey-hole" on a stormy night, hoping I didn't have to drag two little boys there by myself. I've hung Christmas lights on the roof and killed my own bugs. I've sat through more sporting events alone than I want to remember. I fully was single. And fully mom.

When you're a single mom, everyday is Father's Day...but not in the traditional "celebrate how cool Dad is" American holiday. [Most] Single moms do the work of two parents on a normal day. Pay bills, flip pancakes, mow the grass, wipe noses, play catch, drive carpool, do homework...and on and on.

I'll bet you know a single mom, or maybe you were raised by one or a dear friend is raising kids alone... There are only about 10 MILLION of them, chances are pretty good you know a single mom.

I have perfect gift you can give to a single mom this Father's Day.

How about a weekend break! Arise Ministries is having it's 7th Annual Statewide Single Mothers' Conference -- SURVIVE 'N' THRIVE -- June 24-25. This year's theme - The Battle Is the Lord's!

Every single mother should be there.
I mean that.

This is a conference especially for single moms -- of all kinds! There will be widows, moms with husbands overseas, separated, divorced or never married. The weekend offers great Bible teaching, insightful breakout sessions, and sweet fellowship. It's perfect for the broken, the hurting, the tired, the thriving!

Friends, will you please consider sponsoring a mom to attend? Registration is $25 and childcare is FREE. Or how about sponsoring a table of 10 single moms at lunch for $250? (No chicken nuggets or macaroni and cheese! Real.life.grown.up.food.)

Give a single mom this gift on Father's Day -- tell her you believe in her! Send her to this conference where she will hear the truth of God's word and be encouraged by his precious love for her. Who knows, YOU could be the catalyst to changing her life and the lives of her children forever.

Check out conference details here.
Contact our registration line to make a donation 405-812-5137 or make a donation online here, or mail a check to PO Box 2973, Edmond OK 73083. Donations are tax deductible. Arise Ministries is a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization.

Don't know one of the 10 million single moms in the country? (Really?!) That's okay, I know a lot of them...

Now post this on Twitter or Facebook to help raise awareness, k? Thanks.

Goin' Amish

2011-04-18T15:59:00.001-05:00

In this house, when you get grounded, we call it "Going Amish." (I'm not too worried I'll offend the Amish community. They probably are not reading my blog.) It simply means you are grounded from everything electronic.

No TV, No Radio (unless you accidentally hear it in the car), No iPod, No video games, No computer.

Just sentenced to yard work, house work, board games with your brother, playing outside in the confines of your own front yard, etc. You know, like Amish people sans the plain clothes.

One of my children (who shall remain nameless to protect the beloved guilty) has been "Amish" for over a week now. The details of "why" are completely irrelevant.

We've spent a lot of time talking about how this particular "punishment" makes the days go by slooooowwww, when all you have to do is beg your brother to play another game of Chess when he'd rather be doing something else. When everyone is watching a family TV show, the "Amish" go read a book. Boring. And lonely. And it makes you so aware of what you're missing.

My kids know I fast from time to time. This time I told the punished one that he should approach his "grounding" like a fast -- and when he thinks he is going to die because his iPod hasn't been fired up for over a week, he should turn his thoughts to asking God for more self-control and for Him to change his heart so this problem doesn't continue to be a stronghold.

I call the behavior what it is. Sin. And I teach them how to be freed from its grip.

We can squeeze our kids into a mold to "make" them behave but I am learning it is more effective to teach them how to invite the Holy Spirit to change them from the inside out. Otherwise, he'll be goin' Amish again soon. I think he is beginning to see this round of grounding as a time to examine his heart and pray for a change, rather than just "surviving until grounding is over."

This is no ordinary child.
Just you wait and see...

I love these kids.

Before I was 12

2011-03-31T13:24:00.001-06:00

Caution: This post is boring unless you're me.

Can you remember what your life was like before you were 11 or 12? When I try to remember things about life way back then, it's tough. Of course I remember the big stuff, but the ordinary, boring, mundane day to day stuff? Well, not much of it remains in my head. I tell my boys all the time, "You probably won't even remember this [insert some random unimportant life event] when you're older..." They don't believe me...for now.

This morning I was trying to remember everything I could about age 6-12 (because I have nothing else to think about?!) Here are the highlights of the random stuff I do remember. I have no idea why [most of] these things are stuck in my head.

Playing with this kid named Andy who lived nearby. We tried to jump over the driveway because it was "lava."

712 North Richmond Avenue. That is the address of the church I went to. The one where I accepted Christ and was baptized on the day I wore this pink gingham skirt my mom sewed for me.

Watching my mom trap a tiny lizard with a butter bowl in our living room. (My mom was the original crocidile hunter...)

Riding my green shamrock bike with a banana seat

When my 4th grade teacher taught us a song about nouns...I could sing it if you'd like

Being in Student Council in elementary school and thinking I was a big shot

Playing school with my sister and ALWAYS getting to be the teacher (or I would not play)

Listening to BJ Thomas on cassette tape on the way to school

Chasing down a super-cute 4th grader to get him to sign my yearbook

The sound of Ms Hogan's freakishly loud whistle at Porter Elementary

The names of the 5 Kim's in my kindergarten class... Kim Watson, Kim Douglas, Kim PIttman, Kim Hardesty and Kim Williams.

Jeans that had an embroideried roller skate on the back and the word SKATE on the other pocket. (Don't be jealous.)

The snack bucket for Blue Birds

That my favorite teacher in the universe had a son named Troy.

I wonder what random things my boys will remember when they are 40. I wish they would remember every day of our lives together. It's pretty cool.

Anything random you remember about life before 12?

Lost At Sea...and in Real Life!

2011-03-10T09:02:00.001-06:00

I demanded we eat dinner together last night. It was the only night we didn't have soccer, track, or meetings on the calendar. Honestly, when I plan a "family night," it's pure awesomeness in my mind but the actual outcome often falls short of my utopian expectations. Nevertheless, I keep trying to make memories my kids won't forget...

The event: Lost at Sea - a survival scenario
You may have done this before but try it with your family, it's interesting.

Download this pdf. - Lost at Sea
It outlines the whole scenario. Your plane crashed in the middle of the ocean. You managed to salvage 15 items and you must rank the items in order of importance. On the list are things like 15 ft of nylon rope, shaving mirror, 2 boxes of chocolate bars, and maps of the Ocean, etc.

I covered the kitchen table with brown paper and wrote all 15 items all over the table. Before dinner, I read the scenario to them and as we ate we discussed all the items and what we could do with them. My guys were pretty creative with a few things and other ideas were downright dumb. BUT it kept conversation going and our brains engaged with each other to solve problems. After dinner, each person got their own list and had to rank the items in order of importance. All our lists were different. (I put the chocolate bars higher on the list than the guys did...Go figure!)

I read the answers, according to the US Coast Guard and we scored our lists. The Foxy Mr would have been rescued, Kid Two and I would have had dehydration but been rescued and poor Kid One (who is very logical in real life) -- only his raft would have washed up on shore long after the search was called off! (Kid Three was sent to bed during all of this for throwing a fit over eating green beans.)

The game concluded with a little practical application. (Our family has a list of people we are praying to receive Christ)

(Our conversation went something like this:)
This game is called Lost at Sea... but there are people who are Lost in the World - they are without Christ. There is only one thing on the list that will save them. It is the blood of Jesus. It is up to us to be a light in the lives of these people, to point them to Jesus who saves. You can rationalize and analyze all the things that could be useful to them but the truth is the same - they are still lost and destined for destruction without Jesus.

Then we cleaned up and went about the business of bickering about who takes out the trash and who has to sweep the kitchen floor...

Try this with your family. It's fun.

Remember, what's in the well comes up in the bucket!

Sustaining Grace, Magnificent Restoration

2011-02-18T16:56:00.008-06:00

Over 11 years ago my life was dramatically different. I was a recent single mother learning to deal with enough heartache to last a lifetime. Just me, two very small boys, and countless early mornings before the Throne crying out for mercy and grace. (My full story is here.)

I remember finding this scripture:
Psalm 68:5-6
A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,
is God in his holy dwelling.
God sets the lonely in families,
he leads out the prisoners with singing;

I remember how there was a time when God was ALL I had -- the only thing I could rely on.
I remember how the Father became a father to my boys, filling in the gaps left by mistakes made by their parents.
I remember how I felt He was defending me to the spiritual enemy seeking to steal my joy.
I remember the lonliness fading each time I knelt before Him.
I remember how He was my song when my heart was imprisoned by rejection from man.

Time passed. The scripture remained - but took on a different form in my life.
Psalm 68:5-6
A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,
is God in his holy dwelling.
God sets the lonely in families,
he leads out the prisoners with singing;

Soon the body of Christ, my church, demonstrated "fatherness" to my kids - validating them, spending time with them, teaching them how to be young men.
Soon the body of Christ, my church, took care of me - helping me with my car, childcare, and whatever else I needed.
Soon the body of Christ, my church, became my family - my companions, my best friends.
Soon my prison of isolation was destroyed.

6 years ago I married Chad Heinecke.
This scripture remains and now has personal promise to me.
Psalm 68:5-6
A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,
is God in his holy dwelling.
God sets the lonely in families,
he leads out the prisoners with singing;

Thank you Chad Heinecke for being a father to my boys - for loving them and accepting them as your own - as Christ would.
Thank you Chad Heinecke for defending me, for taking care of me, for loving me - as Christ would.
Thank you Chad Heinecke for your companionship, for setting me in "family" with you - as Christ would have done to the lonely.
Thank you Chad Heinecke for working tirelessly to be a joyful song in my heart.

February 19 - our anniversary.
It's a day I find myself reflecting on the faithfulness of God to show himself to us in a personal, tangible way. In those early days of my singleness I rejoiced in His sustaining grace. Now, six years into this life with my foxy Mr, I am still amazed at His magnificent restoration of a dream.

Psalm 27:13 "I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living." In this life, I have seen it.

Happy anniversary, Mr Heinecke. You are the real thing. :)

Waiting

2011-01-07T08:45:00.004-06:00

I'm waiting for Little to get here.
I'm waiting for the cold front to sweep across Oklahoma so I can use the fabulous seat warmers in my car.
And I'm waiting on God to do a few things in my world.

I've often gone about the whole "waiting" thing all wrong. I'll find other things to occupy my time or try to "forget" what it is I'm waiting for, just to make time move faster -- because I'm impatient and I want what I want when I want it, which is NOW.

But I'm learning something about waiting.

In the life of a Believer, we are called to wait upon the Lord and the Bible is full of references to waiting...

Psalm 130:5 - I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits,
and in his word I put my hope.

Waiting is not passive, as I've often thought. While I wait for Little to arrive, I'm not just sitting on the sofa doing nothing! I'm preparing the baby room, washing tiny clothes and sewing precious blankets. I'm doing what is necessary to be able to properly receive what I'm waiting for.

And waiting on God? Is it any different? I don't think so.
It's an active patience. It means as I wait I am consumed with spending time with Him, pouring my heart out to Him in prayer, studying His word, dying to myself and accepting His timeline. It has nothing to do with just sitting idle and "hoping" that something will happen.

It is the actively patient Believer that experiences the answer to prayer, the deliverance, the inner healing, the blessing!

Believers, let us actively wait on God to move in our lives -- not with a spirit of passivity, but a spirit of expectation and active patience!

I'm Expecting...But More Than You Think

2010-09-24T21:29:00.011-05:00

The only thing more surprising to me than discovering I was expecting Kid Four was my reaction to the news.

I wasn't thrilled.
At.all.

I spent a good amount of time arguing and pouting with the Lord because he apparently didn't wear a watch...

I'm 40.
My oldest will be racing to the age of 14.
I was willing to have another baby about a year ago...but not now.
I was just starting to see another chapter begin. Or so I thought.

Me. me. me.

I grumbled and snarled through the first upset tummy weeks, whimpered and cried through the intense exhaustion and shook my invisible fist at my Maker because "this isn't what I wanted."

And now, at 2 weeks from delivery, my heart has changed. Finally. It probably happened about 3 months ago but I've waited to be sure it was going to "stick." ha.ha.

I found myself praying for peace in this situation because I was unnerved and anxious about having more kids. Can I keep up? What if the baby has physical disabilities? What if Kid Four is...a girl?!

Jesus has already promised me His peace. (Eph 2:14 - For He himself is our peace...) I was just choosing to live in my own flesh and selfishness. I began praying more for His wisdom and revelation than for something I already have (but choose to neglect).

I am so thankful, through the inner workings of the Holy Spirit, I can look on the upcoming adventure with a sense of excitement and gratefullness. Thank you Father for changing my heart. (And not a day too soon, I might add!!)

I'm expecting big things from these four kids we'll be raising.
I'm expecting them to live a life worthy of the gospel of Christ.
I'm expecting them to join the Foxy Mr and I in building a legacy of passionate believers.
I'm expecting them to be world changers for the Kingdom.

God never disappoints, although he often "surprises."
Amen?

I Want to be Mrs. Noah

2010-09-14T15:24:00.008-05:00

I think I could do better.

Whoa, now. Hold on... I'm not looking for another husband. I'm as happy as a monkey eating a cupcake being Mrs. Heinecke. It's just that I saw a a musical in Branson, MO this weekend that has my mind spinning.

We all know the story of Noah and his 2-star, pet-friendly houseboat. But have you ever really stopped to think about his wife? Me neither. Until Saturday night.

Noah was the one who had prophecy spoken over him when he was born. (Gen 5:29). Noah was the one who walked with God. (Gen 6:9) and it was Noah who received the instruction to play rodeo round-up with every living creature on earth.

Not one mention of his wife being in on the conference call with God.

Can you imagine the faith it must have taken for her to stand by her man for over 100 years while he whittled away at the cypress wood to make the most ginormous boat ever?

Did she roll her eyes, wishing he would go get a "real" job?
Did she mock him for following "what he thinks" he heard from God?
Did she ridicule him in front of their boys so they would lose respect for him?

I doubt it. Otherwise, I can't imagine she would have stepped one foot into that smelly, dark zoo. And her sons?! Not only did they come along, they convinced three lovely women to join them. I have to believe it took Mrs. Noah to ultimately convince those ladies they were not crazy for believing what they could not physically see. She had to be pretty terrific for those wives to willingly sign up for solitary confinement with their Mother-in-law! (I love my MIL, by the way.)

I've found myself thinking a lot about her...
...I imagine she spent many nights praying the Father would give her the strength to support her husband, even if she thought he might juuuust be a bit crazy sometimes.
...I imagine she begged the Father to increase her own faith in Him.
...I imagine she pleaded with God to help her focus her eyes on what is unseen, for what is seen is temporary.
...I imagine she wore out her knees praying God would bless the work of Noah's hands and give him clarity of vision.

She obviously loved God. (Cause a girl can't love her guy like that without God.)
She honored, supported and encouraged her husband.
She trained their children in the fear of the Lord so when the time came, they got in that boat!

Sheesh. Noah gets all the attention. But I assure you, Mrs. Noah was no dripping faucet. I want to be like her -- for MY Noah, who is leading our family to lay it all down for the sake of the unseen.

I Love #82

2010-08-31T15:27:00.005-05:00

If I had a shirt that said just that, I'd wear it proudly.

Tonight my son plays in his first 7th grade football game. I am seriously so excited about this football season, particularly since this is his first "school ball" game and he gets to play at the high school. Mostly I'm excited because I am so in love with this kid. (And his brothers)

He's #82. And when I watch the team practice, I stare at him. Amazed. In awe that a person so wonderful, so treasured, belongs to me. He's a little extenstion of my heart running around in those big bulky pads. And to say anything bad about him would be to invite a fisticuffs with his momma. (I just wanted to use that word. I'm not really that tough.)

Then another thought occurs to me.

If God had a football team and I was on it, I bet he'd be saying the same thing about me. I can see him...wearing a button with my picture, waving his big foam finger when I score (and ~~even~~ especially when I miss the pass!), and maybe a big posterboard that declares his love and faithfulness to me no matter what! My biggest fan.

I call to Him, "Keep me as the apple of your eye." Psalm 17:18
And He answers, "...I have loved you with an everlasting love..." Jeremiah 31:3

I'll remember this tonight when Kid One takes the field and the Invisible Me cheers wildly for him as if he is the master of the turf, despite all the other moms around who feel the same way. I'll remember I have a Father who is cheering me on, too. Because I belong to Him.

We may not have a huge fan club on this earth, but one thing is for sure, our God is for us!

What's That On Your Shoulder?

2010-08-05T22:31:00.003-05:00

Kid Two had a friend spend the night tonight. I drove them to get a movie. A PG movie is nearly all that is allowed for age 10 in our house. Kid Two's friend made it perfectly clear he was allowed to watch almost anything. I made it perfectly clear our boundaries are sometimes a little different and it may seem weird but it works for us.

Surprisingly (this time) Kid Two didn't begin his exhausting argument about how "everyone else...fill in the blank..." Maybe he is beginning to see the effects of "garbage in, garbage out" on some of his friends. Maybe the truth of the Word is penetrating his heart deeper and deeper.

What he did say made the Invisible Me jump in the passenger seat to hug and squeeze his precious little face.

"[Friend], my mom's not out to spoil my fun. She's just there to flick the devil off my shoulder sometimes." Then he gave me a genuine "thanks for looking out for me" wink.

I've said it before... What's in the well will come up in the bucket.

Sincerely,
Kim Heinecke, a.k.a. Devil Flicker
(It's not really the title I'd pick for myself but a mom's got to do what a mom's got to do...)

I wish my obsessions were this simple

2010-03-03T14:32:00.007-06:00

I love toddlers.

They have a mind of their own.

Kid Three has been borderline obsessed with two things lately.

1. pockets

2. pretend goggles from his pretend tool set

Pockets - He wants to wear a jacket with pockets, or jeans with pockets, or a sweatshirt with a front pocket. He will not hold your hand because he is (and I quote) "wuhkin my pockets." Work it, baby. Work it.

Goggles - These stay on his head. Rarely on his eyes -- and that's probably because they are too smudged from snot... or cereal... or banana... or butter from his toast... or whatever else can be found on a toddler's hands! He keeps them on his forehead and protests when you try to take them off, despite the deep red marks they are beginning to leave above his eyes. He even wore them to the doctor's office today. And yes, during nap.

I wish my obsessions were this simple.

Hidden Treasure

2010-03-02T17:35:00.005-06:00

For some of you, this will be a lame trick.
For others, you'll try it and call me brilliant next fall.

Does anyone other than me get a rush from sticking your hand into a coat pocket and finding a $5 bill you didn't know you had? Sheer bliss. Free coffee. The expensive kind.
I love that feeling. When I find a buck or two in a pair of jeans I haven't worn in a while I am totally consumed with how to spend it. It's not allocated to any part of my budget. No one can ask for it and I don't have to share it.

New lipgloss? 5 items from the Dollar Tree? A combination burrito from Taco Bueno? The possibilities are endless.

To make life more fun I plan my own surprises. (You know what's coming) As the weather gets warmer I tuck a couple of bucks in a coat pocket, or a fall purse or maybe a warm hoodie pocket that I know I'll use again at the first sign of fall. Conveniently I manage to forget about it. And trust me, when I'm over the dog days of summer and I finally get to reach for my favorite jacket, I am soooooooooo excited to find a crisp $5 bill.

Yes. That I purposely hid. From myself.

My husband thinks that is nuts. I think he's just upset he can't get a skinny vanilla latte from Starbucks without dipping into his allocated weekly budget.

Am I alone on this? It's possible.

(Make a note to yourself: Always borrow clothing items from me at the beginning of a season. It'll increase your chances of a surprise.)

The Truth of Nothing

2010-02-25T07:32:00.006-06:00

A couple of things fell off the wall when he slammed the door. It doesn't happen often but when Kid One does blow up, it's major. In the heat of "battle" he said things to me that were mean. And it hurt. But I knew he didn't mean it because I know his heart. I left him in solitude in his room until I came home from a meeting a couple of hours later.

On the way to and from that meeting I cried, prayed for him, for me as a mom, for his heart, his mind and a million other things. He was acting from a place of woundedness.

I opened the door to his room when I returned. Tears filled his "quickly-turning-into-a-young-man" eyes.
Mom, can I talk to you?
I am so. so. so. sorry for what I did.
And he was visibly repentant.

I put down my coat and purse and took my place on the end of his bed.
Son, there is nothing you can do to make me stop loving you. Nothing you can say. Nothing you can think. Nothing you can throw. Nothing you can slam. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.
My unconditional love for him healed his heart. I think he slept better than he had in days.

Our heavenly father is the same with his own children. There is nothing we can do to make him stop loving us. Nothing. We can't act bad enough, miss enough church, participate in enough habitual sin, have weak enough faith, yell enough at our loved ones, or even walk far enough away from the will of God. He loves us. No getting around that.

There is nothing we can do to stop His love for us. Understanding this truth leads to a repentant heart and motivates us to run after him whole-heartedly.

Someone may need to embrace this truth today.
Let your heart be healed by His unconditional love for you.
You.

Winter be gone.

2010-02-22T08:42:00.003-06:00

That's it.
I am breaking up with winter.
And the rain...and the "flurries"...and the "munchies." It seems they all go together. The nerve of my pants to shrink just because there is a lack of consistent sunshine!

I used to be a fan of the cold weather because you could make soups, sit by a fire, wear all your cool scarves and snuggle up to watch a movie. But my days of wearing two pair of socks just to keep the blood in my feet circulating are wearing on me.

B'bye winter. Git on out now, y'hear?

And it gives me writer's block. I guess I have run out of things to blog about.

Same Game, Different Kids

2010-02-12T07:37:00.004-06:00

For years, when my older boys were small, I would play this little love game with them...

Me: I love you!
Kid: I love you too.
Me: I love you more...
Kid: I love YOU more...
and on and on and on until it got boring.

Funny how different kids can be.

Kid Two was challenging at times (to put it oh-so-mildly). One time after I exercised the discipline of "laying on hands" while I "trained him in the way he should go" I tried the Love Game on him. It went like this:

Me: I love you.
Kid Two: love you too
Me: I love you more...
Kid Two: (...if looks could kill...) You probably do.

Huh.

Just this week I played it with Kid Three, who is generally very agreeable and so easy going. EASY (for now, anyway.) This was his exchange after he tested the lines just a wee little bit:

Me: I love you baby.
Kid Three: I yuv you mommy
Me: I love you more, more, more!
Kid Three: (hesitant) ...Ah-wight.

Same game, different kids. I love the variety of parenting.

I Made This With My Own Two Hands

2010-01-31T18:00:00.011-06:00

I've been looking on Craigslist and Ebay and every place else online for a while to find a mannequin. This weekend Robin emailed me a link to a mannequin tutorial. I just happened to have a little margin in my life right now so I whipped one out on Sunday.

...and by "whipped it out" I mean it only took me FOUR AND A HALF HOURS. And $40, and duct tape, an old pillow, an old blanket, quilt batting, 2 yards of muslin fabric, a glue gun, an umbrella base and a dowel rod.

I followed the tutorial listed here -- somewhat. I gave Mannie Kin some "shape" in the front so she wouldn't look like a boy. And since it is too cold to spray paint the dowel rod I decided to leave it au'natural because I couldn't wait for the weather to warm up.

Want to see her fully clothed? Check it out here. I had this new outfit waiting for her arrival.

Get a piece of Awesomeness...w/ Cindy Beall

2010-01-26T01:48:00.001-06:00

My friend, Cindy Beall is hosting a Week of Awesomeness on her blog. Skip on over there to find out how to win an apron from Pink Licorice.

While you are there, be sure to read a few posts. You will be blessed! She is one of favorite women in the history of people.

Thanks for hosting a giveaway, Cindy!

It's not just me looking out for my boys

2010-01-22T04:52:00.001-06:00

All day Wednesday I was planning to attend Bible Study in the evening. 6pm neared and I began feeling uneasy about leaving the kids alone while the Foxy Mr. traveled. The house was a little chaotic, Kid Three was whiny but I really wanted to go. Yet something felt off.

I shook it off, grabbed my keys and Bible and told the boys I'd be home in a little over an hour. As I left the neighborhood I saw a flash of lightening and heard a small clap of thunder. No rain, no wind, just a sign it was coming.

I turned the car around and went back home. Not ten minutes later the rain came, the wind blew and the big thunder announced the storm ... and our electricity went out. Dark and quiet for a short time.

And then it made sense.

That "uneasy" feeling was the gentle voice of the Spirit "encouraging" me to stay home -- to be there for my guys when the lights went out, to light a candle and get out the flashlight in case the next time the power outage was longer. No one was even rattled when it happened. Because I was there.

Sometimes I'm amazed at the Father and his attention to detail. He wasn't looking out for me that night. He was taking care of my boys.

How could I not love Him?

Job 37:5 - God's voice thunders in marvelous ways; he does great things beyond our understanding.

A Culinary Genius? I Doubt It.

2010-01-20T22:08:00.004-06:00

Kid Three had quite a party with his snack this week. The menu: pretzels, a few peanuts, sliced cheese and water.

Left alone for about 4 minutes, he created this. I think it's called "pretzel-peanut-cheese" water. Huh.

He grinned, took a sip, then offered me a drink, "You wanit?"

No thank you. Don't quit your day job, K-3. I don't think Gatorade will be buying this flavor anytime soon!

A quick thought on worship

2010-01-19T15:32:00.004-06:00

The human heart craves something to worship, and left to itself, it will worship almost anything. --Jan Winebrenner*

There's a sobering thought. And it's true.

Worship: noun. - reverent honor or homage paid to God, or a sacred personage, or to any object regarded as sacred

I read that this week and took a little look-see into my heart. (I must have been feeling particularly brave!) Father, what do I worship when my heart is left to itself?

my husband and children
my bank account
my girlfriends
my little plans for my future
my goals
the list creeps on and on

The truth is this: there is only room for one object of my worship. Capacity: 1.

Thinking of putting to death the worship of any of these other little gods can be scary because too often we have linked them to our safety.*

Jeremiah 17:9 - "The heart is deceitful above all things..."
The human heart. The heart controlled by the flesh. My heart when I am out of step with the Spirit.

Hebrews 12:2 - "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith..."

Father, teach us the discipline of worship!

Spaghettio's - The Motherload of School Lunches

2010-01-12T08:36:00.007-06:00

I had a Holly Hobby lunch box -- one of the square metal ones that if hit just right, the clasp would open and spill the uneaten remnants of your b-o-l-o-g-n-a sandwich all over the floor of the car rider pick up line.

I remember lunch time in the 4th and 5th grade, in particular. We would open our metal boxes and stand them up so the lid was our "plate" and the bottom portion stood upright on the side, hiding the glorious treasures inside. That was the only sure way to keep looters from stealing the coveted Little Debbie Swiss Cake Roll or the Ding Dong (which was wrapped in TIN FOIL in those days - as it should be). Usually lunch was no big deal. You eat your sandwich (sans crust), devour your chips, lick your fingers and slurp your milk.

But there were those days when your mom proved her love for you, when she really acted like a mom filled with the spirit, willing to lay down her life for her youngin's.

On those days you got Spaghettio's WITH HOTDOGS CUT UP IN THEM. Hallelujah. Kind of like spaghetti but without the annoying chunks of tomato and the long stringy noodles that get your face messy. Tiny well behaved circles of pasta glory at just the right temperature. The food of angels (if you're 10). I'm only slightly embarrassed to say I am salivating at the memory.

I can vividly remember the glory days when I would sit down (always next to my BFF Kim) and proudly display the prized thermos holding the golden pasta tossed in a cheap tomato sauce - with the hot dogs. And if my mom was really the bomb-dot-com that day, she would FRY the weenies before cutting them up!

My children had no idea this was the motherload of all school lunches when I was a kid. I only thought of it recently when I purchased a couple of cans from the store.

I fell in love with Kid Two a little more this morning when he came into the kitchen. The conversation went like this:

Kid Two - Mom, do we have a thermos?
Me - I think so, why?
Kid Two - Because I want to take something different in my lunch today.
Me - Okay, like what?
Kid Two - Maybe like some Spaghettio's.
Me - nearly tearing up
Kid Two - Mom, why are you hugging me and acting weird? Did you even hear what I said?

Yeah, I heard it.
Loud and clear.
What was your favorite lunch in elementary school?

No School, Really?

2010-01-07T08:22:00.004-06:00

It's cold.
I know.
I get it.
Not a good day to kick the boys outside and say, "find something to do until lunch time."

I like having my kids home. They are fun to be with and they don't drain my physical energy like they did when they were 2 and 4. For that reason I don't mind school being closed. But I have to wonder if it is really necessary to close school because of cold weather. Cold weather. Cold.

Both my husband and my sister's husband grew up in Minnesota. She commented last night if they closed school in Minnesota every time it was cold or blew a flake of snow they would STILL be trying to graduate. I happen to agree.

My beef with this school closing is that we still have a lot of winter left. And one snow day left after this. What if it snows? What if it gets cold again? What if someone gets a hangnail? Please, EPS, put on a hat, gloves and encourage parents to just drive their kids to school so they don't have to wait on the bus outside. The same parents who are inconvenienced by driving their little ones to school are the same ones who are scrambling to find childcare today. And trust me, I feel for them - been there.

At least if we're going to cancel school for winter weather we should have some snow to entertain us, right? You can't sled down a hill on "cold."

I don't want another year where our kids have to go to school after Memorial Day. When that holiday rolls around, we are done with school. It's time to play. Besides, by then it might be too hot to enjoy the walk to the bus.

Now, if you'll excuse me, my kids and I are going to put on our warm clothes and get out of the house. As far as I'm aware, I don't think they've cancelled breakfast.
Yet.

If I Didn't Know Your Name

2010-01-01T19:49:00.009-06:00

I'm no different than anyone else who gets excited about a new year... a new decade... a new chance to start (some things) over. I like January 1.

And this year, we are going to be inTENtional in 2010.

One of the things I want to be intentional about is scripture memory. Just today I was talking to a new friend and a passage of scripture came to my mind at the right time. Had I not already studied and "hidden" that in my heart I would not have been able to encourage her when she needed it. So, every so often I will share with you some of the ways we're hiding the Word in our hearts and calling it to memory!

Proverbs 20:11 - Even a child is known by his actions, by whether his conduct is pure and right.

Learning this verse is not a manipulative ploy to get my kids to obey me. It's a gentle reminder to them (and me) that people will know us by what they see -- the fruits in our life.

Borrowing from an idea I read in a book, I asked the kids, "If I didn't know your name, what could I call you that would describe you?" After a blank look, they answered, "Funny, smart, short, athletic, etc."

I took it a few steps further.

Boys, people will know you by your actions - what they see in you. Do they see a reflection of Christ? Do they see someone who is compassionate? Do they see you stand up for the Truth? Or do they see bickering, arguing brothers who never stop fighting about who takes out the trash?

Our actions tell the world what is in our hearts (what's in the well.) If others don't see evidence of our love for God in our life, how will they ever know?

Even a child is known by his actions, by whether his conduct is pure or right. (Adults, it doesn't just apply to children...)

I challenged them to conduct themselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ, whatever happens in this world. (Phil 1:27) because people are desperately looking for what our Savior offers. And we are called to be a mirror. I asked them again, "If I didn't know your name, what would I call you?"

This time the answers were thoughtful and different.
"Kind."
"Loving my family."
"Serious about being a Christian."
"Wanting to have a good heart."

Even a child is known by his actions.
Even a mom is known by her actions.
Even a dad is known by his actions.

I hope they know me as one who loved the Father.

If I didn't know your name, what would I call you?

For My Boys' Scavenger Hunt on Christmas Morning

2009-12-24T23:05:00.003-06:00

Good Morning Kid One and Kid Two (and maybe Kid Three who is probably playing with his tools somewhere in the living room),

So far, so good on these clues!!

To earn your next clue, you must leave a comment on this blog post. Type the Bible verse we worked on yesterday (from memory!) Also tell what that means to you. You can work together. Remember what I told you... what's in the well will come up in the bucket. Dig deep!

(Click on comment, sign in as anonymous.)

Love y'all.
Mom

What's In The Well?

2009-12-23T15:36:00.002-06:00

What's in the well will come up in the bucket.

I ran across this quote in the book I just finished, The Well-Versed Family by Caroline Boykin -- a book about scripture memory w/ your kids. (Good read.)

And now I'm thinking.
Hard.
And I'm wondering... what IS REALLY in the well of my kids' hearts? Have I helped them dig it deep in the Word of God? Is there a good source of living water there? Am I teaching them to really hide the word of God in their hearts and draw on Him when they thirst for the next "thing?"

Or is it only full of video games, basketball and the endless "what's for dinner tonight" question?

What's in the well will come up in the bucket.

I consider their "buckets." There is some water, yes. But it's not as fresh as I like. Not as cold and satisfying as it could be. It can go deeper, I know. I am in charge of those wells right now. It's up to me to make sure they are maintained, at least for now. My time with them is short.

What is in the well will come up in the bucket.

Those wells are going to get a gentle remodel this year. They will thank me for it later. 2010 is going to be a year of digging. And y'all, we're going deep.

Who's with me?

Gobble, gobble! Are you turkey-wise?

2009-11-24T21:46:00.006-06:00

Here's a little quiz to test your turkey smarts. I'm going to use it with my family this week to test their turkey knowledge (and see who really reads my ramblings). Give it a go...

1. When was the first Thanksgiving celebration?
A. 1492
B. 1567
C. 1621
D. 1777

2. Where was the turkey first domesticated?
A. Canada
B. Mexico and Central America
C. New Zealand
D. India

3. What is a female turkey called?
A. a rooster
B. a cuckoo
C. a chick
D. a hen

4. What is a male turkey called?
A. a larry
B. a clark
C. a harry
D. a tom

5. What great American statesman lobbied to make the turkey the national symbol?
A. Benjamin Franklin
B. Thomas Jefferson
C. John Adams
D. Andrew Jackson

6. About how many feathers does a mature turkey have?
A. 1,500
B. 2,000
C. 3,500
D. 5,000

7. Which state produces the most turkeys annually?
A. Kansas
B. Ohio
C. Arkansas
D. Minnesota

8. How fast can wild turkeys run?
A. 5 mph
B. 15 mph
C. 25 mph
D. 45 mph

9. Approximately what percentage of American homes eats turkey on Thanksgiving?
A. 49%
B. 67%
C. 82%
D. 90%

10. What is the name of the skin that hangs from a turkey's neck?
A. snark
B. wattle
C. garble
D. swag

11. Which country consumes the most turkey per year per capita?
A. The United States
B. Israel
C. Spain
D. The United Kingdom

The answers? I put them in the first comment so it wouldn't spoil it for you.
How many did you get correct? I only got 4 correct...

Free Enterprise is Not Dead

2009-11-17T06:54:00.008-06:00

Free enterprise is not dead. And I have proof.

Last weekend Pink Licorice had a booth at a craft show. You know, blessing the world of Edmond, America with the cutest aprons, placemats and calendars since the Louisianna Purchase.

Because we registered late to this event, we were sardined into a classroom off the beaten path and therefore forced to take drastic measures to make sure people knew where to find a little piece of fabulous!

My Kid Two came to visit our event. (He is Employee of the Month at Pink Licorice, ha/ha). I ~~demanded he~~, ~~begged him~~, asked him nicely to wear one of the aprons and go hand out business cards to every eager shopper he saw in the main area. His apron sticker said, "Booth #82. My mom makes these aprons!"

Who can resist a charming 10-year old boy, wearing a girl's apron for his momma? Exactly.

We began to get some traffic but that's not restored my faith in the "American Way." Kid Two then showed up with someone else's brochures, handing them out and pointing them to a different booth. Apparently, someone had hired him in the "main area" to push their products! (He was still wearing the apron so I let it slide.) Would you believe he scored $2 from that gig?

Not long after that, he reappears, holding yet another item from ANOTHER vendor. And two more dollars! The fever caught on in the main area because before I knew it, he had been hired FOUR times to carry product, walk the floor, smile and point shoppers to a particular booth. (Still wearing the apron. Of course. I AM his momma.)

That kid is awesome. Eight dollars in a span of two hours. Not bad for a 10 year old who struggles to pull in $5 a week for little more than making his bed and taking out the trash.

Only in the land of the free...

Christmas Scavenger Hunt

2009-11-08T20:04:00.006-06:00

Remember when you were a kid and opening gifts on Christmas morning took 15.4 seconds?

The Foxy Mr and I have come up with a way to really stretch out the event, and in doing so, we can even give our kids the illusion they are opening countless gifts for hours.

The trick? We plan a scavenger hunt each Christmas morning complete with clues. The festivities begin once we have read the Bible and had some family discussion.

When they were younger (5-7) the "clues" were easy like "Go check the mailbox" or "Look under your bed for your next clue." Each year they get more involved and complex.

My boys look forward to the scavenger hunt each year that usually ends with the "main gift" they share. At their age now, (10-12) they start telling me around Thanksgiving to start working on the clues and "make them hard."

So last year we outdid ourselves. We managed to stretch 5 gifts over 2 hours. I am not kidding.

The clues were things like...

Play Wii Bowling until you both get 2 strikes in a row to get the next clue.

Take your nerf guns, dress in your camo gear and go 2 blocks over in the neighborhood on your bikes. Go up to Mr. Laguardia's door and when he opens it, say "Give us our clue and no one gets hurt!" Of course, he had been given the clue the day before.

Call someone in another city and sing for your next clue. (They had to guess who to call, we didn't tell them. At least 3 unsuspecting relatives were serenaded Christmas morning!)

Other clues involved Bible verses, riddles and more hide and seek. Sometimes a clue solved meant they got to open a gift, sometimes it just meant they got another clue. It was great. While they tried to solve clues, we picked up wrapping paper from the previous gift, exchanged gifts with each other or set the table for breakfast.

Two hours later as they were nearing their "big gift" the breakfast casserole was coming out of the oven, the living room was fairly picked up and the Christmas CDs were in full swing. By the time it was over, they were exhausted from the "thrill." And we were all hungry. At breakfast it was a "play by play" account of the whole scavenger hunt.

If you're looking for a way to jazz up Christmas morning and start a fun family tradition, give this a try. It keeps the fun going longer than it takes to rip open a new package of socks and underwear.

Now, anyone interested in hosting a Christmas clue for my boys on Christmas morning on your blog?

The Shortest Distance Between Two Points

2009-11-07T21:15:00.003-06:00

What is the shortest distance between two points? A straight line, of course.

That's why I'm reading the Old Testament using the Chronological Study Bible, published by Thomas Nelson. I mentioned this to my Bible Study girls but you may be interested in it as well.

I love reading the Old Testament but I'll admit, sometimes I go from one book to another and find myself thinking, Didn't I just read something about this a few days ago? I can't always keep the timeline straight in my head.

The Chronological Study Bible allows you to explore God's word in historical order. For example, as I'm reading about Saul pursuing David I find (nestled in the chapter of 1 Samuel) a few of the psalms David wrote during this time. I've read both passages many times but I loved reading them together - it brought that psalm a little more to life.

It also has a lot of notes about cultures and people of biblical times as well as connections between bibilical history and world events.

It's not a Bible I would tuck under my arm and cart to church. Because of its chronological order it can be dificult to locate a particular book or chapter. But it is a great tool for reading the Bible "from start to finish in order."

If you're looking for another tool to help the Bible come alive, this is a good tool to provide a fresh perspective.

http://www.chronologicalstudybible.com/index.html

Mom's Bible - Enough to Go Around

2009-09-23T14:21:00.005-05:00

Lord willing, my mom will live to be 120. (That's old.) If she should get to meet Jesus before I do, there is at least one thing I would love to have of hers. Her Bible.

It has the same words as mine, but her margin-scribbled commentary is different. That is where she has recorded her thoughts, notes and pieces of her heart. It's the Bible from which much teaching, correction and encouragement have come.

I wonder if my kids will write "Mom's Bible" at the top of a list someday? I pray they do. So, in the spirit of "mom is a referee" I'm settling the argument now.

For Mother's Day this year I received a Bible from each of my boys. They wrote short notes inside the cover to me. From now until they leave home I will write notes to them in the margins -- things I'm praying for them, my thoughts on a particular passage or advice I want them to have.

Like this, for example: John 1:41-42

The first thing Andrew did was to find his brother Simon and tell him, "We have found the Messiah" (that is, the Christ). And he brought him to Jesus.

In the margin of Kid One's Bible I wrote this:

"When he first found his brother..." Son, your brothers are a priority. Pray for them and encourage them in the Word.

My prayer is they will know and be able to see my heart for them - long after they leave home.

Maybe then they will get a glimpse of the countless days I go to the Father on their behalf. Maybe they will even add to it and pass it along to their children. Maybe it will change the lives of my great grandchildren when I'm not around to pray for them personally.

Maybe one of them will preach the gospel to a lost and dying world someday, holding the Bible I prepared for them...

A Hunnerd Bucks - All For You

2009-09-22T04:09:00.001-05:00

If you had $100 to spend on YOURSELF, what would you buy?

You can't give it away, spend it on your kids OR pay bills with it. It's free money, fun money! What's your pick? Would you buy 1 thing or several little things?

Me? I might go for some new jeans that would make the Foxy Mr look twice. ;) or maybe the longest massage I could get for $100.

Let's hear your ideas. I want to be prepared to make a good choice if I ever find a $100 in a parking lot or something.

It could happen, right?

Kind of a Hellen Keller Moment

2009-09-16T19:00:00.015-05:00

Parenting is hard. I don't care what age the kid is.
Should I just stop with that?

Kid Three is not-so-slowly morphing from an abnormally compliant toddler into a real live boy. I knew it would eventually happen so I wasn't caught off guard too much.

He doesn't like vegetables, like most kids his age. So what, I don't like laundry. Next. This was his reaction to mixed vegetables at lunch today.

So I "kept" them until dinner. New meal, same reaction.

When I decided to "drop the hammer" he dropped this. Nice. Where is your daddy?!

It was one of those Hellen Keller moments. Remember the movie when Annie was trying to get her to eat? ugh. He communicates just about as well as HK...

Reluctantly he picked up some of the green beans and put them in the trash. Then he sat in his chair. And cried "CHEESE!!!!" as loud as he could. (Which is indeed loud, I might add.)

Finally I bribed him.

Me: You want cheese?

K3: les. (and he signed please)

Me: You have to eat a bite of vegetables and then you can have a bite of cheese.

K3: noooooooo. CHEESE! (And a tiny cubed carrot goes flying across the kitchen.)

(repeat 652 times, but I'm very calm -- pridefully so)

And then I saw a tiny opening between his lips. I went in. And he chewed. Then I gave him the smallest bite of cheese.

Glory to God. For real.

I am not foolish enough to think this will continue to work. It's an event reserved for home, not public. Make note, today Kid Three fought the law and the law won.

I love this job. Really I do!

I drank the poison and lived to tell about it

2009-09-11T22:43:00.006-05:00

Sometimes I buy bottled water. Sometimes. But don't you dare think you're going to drink one if you could just as easily walk to the faucet and fill up your cup! You'd better be going somewhere that I won't allow my nice glasses to go... I don't mind buying expensive bottled water as long as it isn't wasted.

Apparently, the last 20% of ANY bottle of water my kids drink is poison. What? you ask... POISON!

It must be. There's no other explanation for why I find countless bottles of water on my kitchen counter

or in the garage
or on the back porch
or in the back seat of my car
or wherever...
and all have been consumed leaving the last 20% - the poison, if you will.

My kids, bless their little hearts, are ridiculously serious about avoiding the POISON. Their consistent determination to grab a new water bottle and leave the poison on the counter makes me want to scratch my eyes out. What if their little brother got ahold of that last 20%! What if he drank the poison?! Who knows what would happen to a baby consuming the last few drinks of bottled water! I shudder to think what the Invisible Me would do to those boys if THAT happened.

Last weekend on our camping trip when we finally ran out of water bottles you know what I did? I gathered up 5 bottles of poison laying around on the table ... and.I.drank.it.

And I lived to tell about it. My kids couldn't believe it either.

Someone call the Poison Control Center. I'm out of control.
lll
lll
lll

A dirty word for good clean fun

2009-09-08T10:48:00.023-05:00

Pre-season OU football game + a long weekend in September + good, easy going friends = a perfect camping weekend and that's exactly what we had just a few days ago! But CAMPING is a dirty word, for sure.

There are a number of ways to "rough it." Some have tents and sleep out under the stars... with bugs and sticks poking between your every vertebrae. Other people have tow-behind campers that allow you to sleep up off the ground but still invite the camp sounds and smells to flood your netted adobe. And other people have a house on wheels (with more TVs than I have in my real house) and call it a camper.

The Heineckes have a popup camper. I've blogged about it before (here, here, and here). I luv it. Our friends have a Donald Trump house on wheels. And I'm glad they did! When it was time for the OU game to start, we already had our steaks grilled, corn on the cob buttered and chairs perched outside the mobile mansion to watch the game. (Our set up was better than the game, agreed?)

The look my boys' faces says, "We can no longer count OU penalties on one hand... or two hands..."

Some of you say, "Hey, that's not roughing it!" Maybe. Maybe not. Some of you don't camp at all so hush.

But what we DIDN'T have was
internet,
phones,
neighborhood kids using our bathroom and eating our snacks,
bills to pay, laundry to fold, floors to mop,
football practice, trombone practice,
homework, real work and yard work

We roughed it by playing camp games, hiking to the water, eating off paper plates then throwing them in the fire, sitting around talking about nothing and everything, making homemade ice cream and eating it with plastic spoons and riding ATVs... and we did it all without being bossed around by our clocks.

Oh and there was plenty of dirt. Kid Three isn't too keen on the campground showers (since he doesn't even understand how flip flops work, let alone wear them in the shower!) He takes the tub kind of camp shower.

If your family has never camped, it might be worth looking into. Kids in the great outdoors, learning to make a fire, entertain themselves WITHOUT electricity and stopping long enough to enjoy some of the simpler, finer things in life.

Camping is definitely one of the dirtiest things to provide good, clean family fun.

To think like a 2 year old...

2009-09-03T13:38:00.006-05:00

It's simple when you're 22 months old.

All liquid is JUICE. It doesn't matter if it is milk, bathwater or a pool. It's all juice to Kid Three.

Every animal is a PUPPY. Bears, cats and alligators. Puppies... all of them.

Anything round is a BALL. Which means it will be thrown, fruit included.

I'm thinking about myself as a follower of Christ. Wouldn't it be better if I were that simple minded? What if everything that is contrary to the Word of God in my life was called SIN-- not "compromise" or "situational discernment." What if I really viewed everyone who didn't know Christ as LOST instead of dismissing their spiritual awareness because I'm too self absorbed. What if I considered every trial PURE JOY because I knew my God was going to show up and prove himself to me again.

I wonder how much different I'd be if I was as simple as a near-two year old.

Father, change me. Purify my heart. Simplify me.
..
..

Special Assignment: Master Diaper Changer... for now

2009-09-01T07:48:00.007-05:00

I am a master diaper changer.

I can wipe a hinnie in record time so the small fry won't even know what happened. My utilization of wipes is impressively efficient. Rarely do I distort my face because of the "aroma." I can fold up, roll up, fasten up that diaper into a tiny ball so no smell can escape. Pants up, squirt of Germ-X, two kisses and Kid Three if off and running again, oblivious to the fact that wasn't my favorite part of the day.

My husband is a different story.

Sure, he can change a diaper (and he'd better... he made that little pooper!) but he doesn't do it with as much grace and charm as I do. His breathing becomes irregular and his face gets all messed up. Once or twice I'm sure his eyes watered but there was certainly no joy in those tears. He grunts and rants about how "this is the WORST diaper yet." (Of course it is, Honey.) And the "wrap up" at the end of the event leaves me nervous that "something" might escape if he trips on the way to the trash. Baby is clean but not without feeling like he did something horrible in his pants.
How can two people who both adore Kid Three accomplish the same task so differently? One person feels like it was no big deal, while the other barely made it.

We are not wired the same. It's not his special assignment.

I nurture the small people. I cultivate relationships. I manage, prepare and watch over the affairs of keeping a home. He protects and provides. He leads and discerns what is best for us. I am the heart of the home and he is the strength of it.

I am thankful we are so different because together we demonstrate to the tiny hearts living under our roof what the body of Christ is all about. Different members working as one - each one doing specifically what we are created for. All of us bringing glory to the Father in our own way.

For now, I am a master diaper changer. This is my special assignment and I love it. It may be different in a few years so I will be the best at it. Today.

1 Cor 12:18 - "But in fact God has arranged all the parts of the body just as he wanted them to be."

Live out your calling today. Be the best at it... whether it's changing diapers or balancing the checkbook, writing a book or building a castle with Legos. It's your special assignment.

No Wonder Kid Three is Confused

2009-08-25T12:26:00.007-05:00

What is it about being a baby or toddler that makes people want to call you by something other than your real name?

I don't get it either but that's the way it goes. Kid Three, in his short 22 months of breathing, has already sported many 'a nickname.

"Toot" - The Foxy Mr. has always called him this. No one knows what it means. He didn't "earn" this name the way it implies.

"Puppy" - This is perhaps the most fitting. He follows his brothers around like a puppy. He will fetch whatever they tell him and he adores them so much I wouldn't be surprised if he licked them, given the chance.

"Monkey Boo" - I usually only call him this when I'm trying to catch him... as in "come here you little monkey boo." No, I have no idea what that means. I probably picked this one up from my sister or something --sounds like a name she would use.

"Munkin" - One of my favorites. One day I attempted to call him a monkey but then my brain tried to say Pumpkin. It came out Munkin. He hears this if he is being mischievious.

"Little Buddy - With 2 older brothers and a dad who adores him, you need no more explanation.

"Baby" - Because NO ONE wants to see him grow up too fast.

"Bug Chum" - The latest one to make the list. I'm watering plants for a friend out of town. There are wapillions of mosquitos in her backyard. Puppy was helping me but by the time he went to bed he had huge red bumps all over his face and arms. Poor little bug chum.

"Kid Three" -Although we never really say this one out loud. It's his "tri-dub identity" to protect his little baby self.

What about your kids? Do you have a favorite nickname for your youngins? Do tell.

This Almost Made Me Want Another Baby

2009-08-21T10:05:00.006-05:00

Friday morning, back porch with coffee, floors already mopped, laundry done, quick review of my favorite blogs, and baby eating a "nan na."

I said it almost made me want another.

The scenery wasn't as nice when the nan na was gone.

*Cue crying toddler*

When You Shouldn't Let Him Lead

2009-08-19T15:07:00.005-05:00

My Bible Study group is amazing, so it's no surprise we had an amazing discussion about marriage this week. It reminded me of something I've tried to practice over the last several months.

Not following my husband's lead. (Take it easy lady, in the small country church. Let me explain.)

Now before I go on, I'm going to make one thing very clear. The Foxy Mr is awesome. He is the steadiest person I know. I always know what I can expect from him - and that spells LOVE to a girl who delights in security and dependability. And he's human, like the rest of us. There. Let's move on.

When things happen that can twist your nerves like a ball of string in a dryer
Like a tough day at work
Or the kids' incessant bickering
Or an electric bill that is astronomical
Or just an "off" day from lack of sleep
Or any other event that can make you want to roll your eyes back in your head...way back.

When stuff like that happens and his mood is a little off, I am careful not to follow. I try not to take it personal. If I do, I end up mirroring the frustration or irritation and then the whole house is off kilter - and the kids wonder what in the world is going on! I don't dismiss his concerns, but I know how important it is to set the tone in the house. I do whatever I can to keep positive and give him space (and pray for him). He bounces back much quicker than I do!

Happy people are more fun to be around. Knowing that fuels my effort to look on the bright side of things and to keep my chin up. And to smile more at him when he isn't having the time of his life. (Cause the Foxy Mr definitely makes me happy, even when my world is on fire.)

Ladies, do you need to stop following his lead (or someone else in your house) on this one? Do you set the tone for a nice evening with a smile, kind word or encouragement to your husband when he walks in the door? Or do you join the crowd when he comes home grumpy from a bad day?

It's hard to stay in a bad mood when you're around happy people that love you.

Thankfully he does not follow MY lead when I'M grumpy. (or when I'm in the passenger seat of the car but that's a totally different blog post...)

Reason #1682 I love him big.

Maybe it's NOT that complicated

2009-08-17T23:15:00.006-05:00

The Foxy Mr and I had some good car time this weekend. Driving through the hills of Missouri we found ourselves analyzing, and well yes, critiquing some of God's creative work.

"It's crazy how complex everything is," I say. "I mean, consider how the body works, all the details and systems, the plants, and nature, and how everything works together. It's so complicated."

"Maybe it's not THAT complicated." he says to me after a couple of miles of silence. "Maybe our mind is just so limited that it seems complicated to us. Maybe you're looking at it wrong."

Of course.

I love simple truths. I often find myself looking at things wrong. I get overwhelmed easily and start to feel the pinch of stress when I think my calendar and clock are bossing me around. Praise Him that the things I see as complicated -- organizing my life, raising my kids, serving my family -- He sees as not that hard to handle.

Thank you, Father, that your ways are higher than mine. When I can't see past the visible, remind me you are more capable than anything I can imagine. It's NOT that complicated...for You.

Uh-oh

2009-08-13T14:28:00.005-05:00

Yes, this blog looks whacked. I can't take the design any longer so I'm trying to figure out how to download a new one. I probably just messed it up for good. :)

Maybe by next week I'll figure out the "simple and easy free template." whatev.

Maybe.

Locked in the car

2009-08-10T21:56:00.007-05:00

It gets hot this time of year in Edmond. It gets hot early and quick.

Especially inside a locked car. ... says Kid Three.

Last week I was in a hurry when I jumped out of the car. I opened the door, pressed the L button rather than the U button. Door locked. I knew immediately when the door shut Kid Three was in trouble. 38 seconds later tiny sweat beads adorned my favorite baby nose.

9-1-1, what is your emergency?

I locked my baby in the car. I'm in the driveway of a friend's house, about 1/2 mile from the fire department. Can someone help me quick? He's 21 months old.

We have an officer and a locksmith dispatched. He will be there in a minute. (or whenever he feels like it)

5 minutes. Kid Three is amused by the faces I'm making through the window.

10 minutes. I am sweating because it's hot on the outside of the car - but Kid Three is laughing at his brother playing peek-a-boo.

15 minutes. His hair is all wet and he looks sleepy.

Still no officer.

20 minutes. Kid Three begins to say "Juuuuuuuice" and pull at his seat belt.

No help has arrived. I kind of start to panic. Are they WALKING here?

22 minutes and the locksmith and the police finally show up and to liberate my baby from the '98 Ford Expe-sauna. (The Invisible me slapped both of them for taking so long, but that's beside the point.) The locksmith apologetically collects his $780/hour. I give the little refugee a drink and take him into the air conditioning. All better. Free. Safe.

Please make a note: If you get out of your car, get your keys. Playing this little 9-1-1 game is both frightening and expe-hen-sive. You've been warned.

Sorry Kid Three. My bad. It won't happen again.

I'm in love with my fabric softener so I have to do this...

2009-08-02T22:59:00.021-05:00

It began with a free sample of this: Downy Total Care. It smells SO GOOD. Olfactory bliss, no lie. It's the kind of smell that makes you double-sniff when you wake up to turn over at night. Dee-lish.

But they are not giving this stuff away. And the Foxy Mr. won't increase my grocery/household budget just because I've got a new love affair with fabric softener. (men...)

Lucky for me, my MIL recently introduced me to the idea of making my own laundry detergent. I agreed to the adventure because I thought it would be fun to try. Little did I know it would be so CHEAP and EASY. With my homegrown soap I can eliminate the $15 bottle of Tide and keep buying Downy.

And lucky for you, I'm going to share the love so you can continue to buy YOUR favorite fabric softener too!

---------------------------------------------------------------

HOMEMADE LIQUID LAUNDRY SOAP

You need: Fels-Naptha bar soap, Borax, Washing Soda, Water, 5-gallong bucket with a lid

1. Grate the bar of soap and add to a saucepan with about a quart of water. Stir continually over medium-low heat until soap dissolves and is melted. I used Fels-Naptha bar soap. The recipe says you can use Sunlight, Kirk's Hardwater Castile or Zote bars. Don't use heavily perfumed soap. This is found at Ace Hardware (in Edmond).

2. Fill a 5-gallon bucket half full of hot tap water. Add melted soap, 1/2 cup Borax and 1 cup washing soda (both found in the laundry or cleaning aisle at the store). Stir well until all the powder is dissolved. Fill the bucket to the top with more hot water. Let it sit overnight to thicken.

3. The next day the "concoction" will be somewhat of a gel. You can add 10-15 drops of essential oil per 2 gallons. (Examples: Lavender, rosemary or tea tree oil).

4. Use about 1 cup for a top load machine. With that kind of value, I can afford my beloved Downy Total Care.

For Real This Time

2009-08-01T21:32:00.004-05:00

Every week when I see my BSers I say the same thing... (that's "Bible Study girls" for my two last readers who haven't yet removed me from their Reader list...) I say, "That's it! I'm getting back on my blog...Twitter...and Facebook." And really, I only mean it for about 6 minutes.

I've.been.busy.

Busy moving...twice. Busy with an amazing ministry conference for single moms... Busy raising little world-changers. And laundry. (Their pants just keep getting bigger and taking up more space in the washer!!)

Today is one of the few days in the last several weeks I've sat alone with my 'puter on the sofa to read some of my favorite blogs. I cautiously clicked on my Google Reader for fear of how many posts it would show I have to read. I guess it resets once it hits 10,000 because I only had 43 on the list... Wow, I've missed a lot! Y'all are funny and thought-provoking. What have I done without you all for the last 90 days?

So, I mean it this time. I will now return to my regularly scheduled spontaneity. (What?)

Redneck Date Night

2009-05-04T13:25:00.000-05:00

Who says you can't get a man with a gun?

Whatever.

A couple of weeks ago the foxy Mr. and I went on a very redneck date night. And it was a hoot. Where'd we go? Glad you asked.

The.gun.range. Yes, we did.

(At least one girl in my BS group just whooped and hollered)

I was so nervous and shaking the whole time while he loaded the gun because I've never held a gun that had a "magazine." (That's the bullet holder for all you novice sharp-shooters) Yeah, and now I'm soooo knowledgeable... :)

He showed me the proper way to load, aim, and shoot. The Invisible Me was playing an episode of 24 in my mind... I was Jack Bauer's assistant and he was so in need of my mad firepower skills...because he was being held captive by some really bad guys trying to kill the president...and me, in my arsenal glory showed up just in time to annihilate the foreign terrorists and save the day by putting a hole in the Blue Smurf enemy... Of course. Whew. Super-hero'in is hard work.

I'm not sure I can actually kill an intruder if they come into my house but I can sure scare them and maybe take off a finger or two (if I aim for the heart)... Let's just say I need a lot of work. But seriously, take note of the shell you see flying out of my gun. That is good cameramannin', Foxy Mr.

But here we are, on our redneck date night. And YES, I was the dork asking someone to take a picture of us! But PLEASE notice where I am pointing... The heart. YES, I made that shot.

Don't break into my house and think you're going to get to my babies.

You've.been.warned.

Colossians 3

2009-04-28T21:07:00.005-05:00

I am not sure how we got from Colossians chapter 3 to the Lord of All using our bathroom.

But we did.

...

Chapter 3..."Since then you have been raised with Christ...yada, yada, yada...Therefore as God's chosen people...so on and so forth...wives, submit, husbands, love, children OBEY...yada, yada, yada... Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord..."

...

And then it went like this...

...

Me: Guys, "whatever you do" let's talk about "whatever" - like cleaning the bathroom...

Kid One: Oh, I knew you were going to take it there. Like God is going to come in and use our bathroom.

Kid Two: Man, if he did, he would see I didn't clean all the pee off the seat.

Me: Wait, wait.

Kid One: You never do, [Kid Two].

Kid Two: Well, it's not like he'll need to poop. (sorry, I'm just keeping it real. It wasn't disrespectful but a real conversation that happened during our Bible study.)

Kid One: Of course not. Do you hear yourself?

Kid Two: Well, if he did I guess he could hover. I mean, he is God.

Me: I am a failure.

...

Coffee Shop Conversations

2009-04-11T08:21:00.004-05:00

This morning I'm sitting at Panera Bread working on my notes for the retreat next weekend. I needed a little mental break so I decided to throw a bone to the last 5 readers who have stayed with my during my writing break. Thank y'all.

Although I don't intend to eavesdrop, who can really help it? C'mon. Be real.

To my left: 3 men talk about sports. I don't understand any of it but it is precious - and not in a condescending way - just precious. Roger Clemmons, Hank Aaron, and some other names that honestly, I don't know if they are athletes or politicians... Then they talk about swingsets for their grandkids and fixing cars. I love how different men and women are.

To my right: 4 women discuss, with great emotion, how someone lost a bag from a shopping afternoon. This particular story is taking MUCH longer than the sports/swingsets/car topics covered by the men. But really, I'm captivated by the shopping bag story - oh, the details. ha/ha

People in line for their bagels smile politely at each other and attempt to "fix" their appearance since it is clear no one took time to shower before they came to sip coffee.

Two other people are typing on laptops and now I'm wondering if they are blogging about me. (And in case they are, I am now smiling mischieviously to give them something good to write about. Oh, I just laughed out loud for them, in case they ARE watching me.)

Alright, back to my study. The clock waits for no one.

Jesus, I pray you show yourself to these people today. Where there may be darkness in their lives, bring your light. May your love be sweeter to them than this chocolate chip bagel with cream cheese!

What.is.that.smell?

2009-03-31T20:39:00.003-06:00

Oh my.

I've been pretty busy around my little castle -- taking care of kids, preparing for a retreat in Tulsa and working with a non-profit ministry I adore. All good-busy, but busy. I've put myself on a Twitter diet, a Facebook diet, a shopping diet and a blogging diet.

...

And the other thing that has kept me distracted? That horrible, Horrible, HORRIBLE smell in my garage. Seriously, what is that smell?

...

Apparently, the Foxy Mr. left me a little gift while he went out of town. It turns out there's a little "problem" with our second refrigerator - the one that makes the dreadful humming sound that can be heard INSIDE the house despite the fact it's not in the house. Oh no.

...

Apparently, the MANY packages of meat that were chill-axin' in my freezer were disrupted from their frozen vacation when the Foxy Mr. unplugged the appliance a week or so ago, to silence the humming ruckus. Not the dandiest idea he's ever had. (But I still think he's amazing.) ...And then he left town... Without telling me he unplugged it. ggggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

...

Apparently, meat, especially the uncooked kind, requires a temperature lower than the nice spring numbers Edmond Oklahoma has posted the last couple of days. Much lower. So the philly steak pucks, and loads of chicken breasts began to revolt and grow the worst case of funk you can imagine.

...

Apparently, this kind of stench evokes quite a response on the olfactory system...which is tied to the digestive system...which produces a violent event when thrust into reverse...which is all I'm going to say about that...

...

So I gagged, and cleaned and bagged the chicken that was supposed to satisfy my dinner menu plan for the next two weeks. Then I skipped dinner due to lack of interest.

...

And because I like to use real life events to reflect on life when things go weird, I reminded myself that if I don't stay plugged into the Word and keep my cool, I'll be stinky and not fun for anyone. It's true, you know.

...

Without Jesus, we all begin to go bad.

My Little Black Eyed Pea

2009-03-24T21:02:00.002-06:00

Kid Three took a tumble today. One minute he was sitting on my bed, minding his own business... and the next minute he took a trip through the air via my nightstand. Not sure what happened. I was standing right there but couldn't catch him.

Doesn't every kid fall off a bed and smack their face on something hard at least once before the age of two? It's kind of a right of passage. He's a real boy now.

Passing Time in the ER

2009-03-08T14:29:00.002-06:00

Thumbs down on the snot in this house! There is plenty of it, too.

...

Last weekend, Kid Two had battled a fever and congestion for 2 days when he began to get an earache. This kid has had quite a battle with earaches in his life. His little right eardrum has ruptured about 8 or 9 times already, so when he says "My ear hurts," I know it's the real deal.

...

It always happens on Friday, after 5pm, when the doctor's office closes. nice.

...

This time it was 11pm on Saturday night when the extreme pain began for him. Knowing he couldn't make it until Monday, he and I took a little "field trip" to the emergency room. I'm not going to say which one in case one of you reading this blog works there. Let's just say the next time we go, Kid Two and I agreed we would beef up the drama a little more with some crying and yelping so we can skip the 3 hour tour of the waiting room. ugh.

...

To pass time we prayed. First we prayed again and again for his pain to subside. Once that was under control, we began to pray for all the other people we saw and heard in the emergency room. A kid crying next door, a man with chest pain, a little girl with a nasty cough...

...

We didn't pray with thembut we prayed together in our little triage room. It was a great teachable moment for Kid Two. And for me. We talked about how Jesus came for the sick, not the healthy and how He is our great physician in all things. Before we knew it, we were on our way home with a little 'cillian to fight the infection.

...

All cozy in our beds by 3:30am, we were very much aware who was fighting for him!

It's Coming

2009-03-06T15:31:00.003-06:00

It's coming this summer.

I am getting so excited!

Tell every single mom you know to go to http://www.ariseministries.net/.

We call it the hot blanket

2009-02-28T15:58:00.004-06:00

If you're cold, you have to fight for it.

If you're sick, you're entitled to it.

If you're mom, you trump all and get it anytime you want.

We call it the Hot Blanket.

It's a heated throw blanket only big enough for ONE. Actually it's slightly too small for one, unless you're under 5 feet tall (and I just barely make the cut). Plug it in and select from 3 temperatures -- LOW, MEDIUM, HIGH. I prefer Medium.

It was a gift a couple of years ago from my guy. He's generally comfortable in our 59 degree winter house (well, it feels like it anyway) and I am usually wearing a sweatshirt, 2 pair of socks and earmuffs. Only once did I wear earmuffs. I have my limits. He bought me a hot blanket probably to shut me up.

We all love to curl up with the hot blanket and watch a movie or something -- but only one person at a time can enjoy its comfort.

Thankfully since it's technically mine, I can have it whenever I want EVEN IF YOU ARE CURRENTLY COZIED UP IN IT. UH-HUH.

Kid Two has been under it all weekend long. He's puny. And I'm generous.

The hot blanket is on my list of reasons to get a generator in case my electricity ever goes out for long.

That's all I've got today. It was a long weekend. :)

I Guess I'll Never Be a Skier

2009-02-24T15:16:00.004-06:00

I've tried. Really tried.

to ski, that is.

I am not a good skier.

And 9 weeks after my last attempt, I still have proof.

We went to Colorado over the Christmas break - as you can see from all these little pictures on my blog. Happy, happy, snow, snow, a family ski trip, here we go.

I ski green runs.

I am violent in my resolve to ski ONLY green.

Green is supposed to be the slowest.

I am supposed to be better after 5 ski trips, lessons, short skis and "helpful tips" from everyone I know.

whatever. some things are just not my bag.

The day we tackle the mountain I am careful to have good hair and wear lipstick - because it is important to look presentable when you're flagging down a medic on the slopes. And in case he didn't think I am cute, I tuck a $20 bill into my coat. Just in case.

My stomach turns as I get on the chair lift, knowing 13.5 minutes and 1500 feet later I will most likely fall off trying to "STAND UP NOW" with my poles as the sign instructs.

My fears did not disappoint, I fell. And jammed my pole in the chair guard to fully stop the lift.

At least Chad's whole family was there to see it live. mmm-hmmm, self esteem builder for sure.

On my first run down I get that "this isn't going to end well" feeling. I am passed by my sister-in-law, Kid One, Kid Two, and Houston cousins One, Two and Three. It is a happy moment - if you're into humiliation. Only my husband who is (for his own safety) obligated to stay with me and my father in law who is not as young as me but clearly a better skier.

Is it time for hot chocolate? I want off of this ride.

I attempt to ski down the mountain but I take a janky fall landing my skis and poles in a yard sale formation in the snow.

I cry. Because I am faced with the realization this is only the FIRST run down and I still have 2 more days of this. And I cry because my knee hurts. BAD. And since I'm not really tough at all but I want to give the illusion I am, I ski more. The Invisible Me kicks off one ski and races down the hill to prove to them I am not a baby.

To make a long story stupid, I limp around the cabin for the rest of the trip. I cringe at night with pain when I try to sleep (and I secretly swear off skiing for the rest of my days.)

4 weeks later my doctor says nothing is broken. 4 weeks after the doctor's xray and I'm still complaining. Coming up on 9 weeks after my incident and I still get out of bed with an uncontrollable grimmace at how clumsy and foolish this injury is. I'm no doctor, but something tells me I should be over this by now.

You know what? I will probably go skiing again. Not because anything inside me craves the rush of wind on my face as I ~~ski~~ roll down the mountain, but because the Foxy Mr. is an incredible skier and he loves it. And because I love him, I'll give it another whirl. I know he's kind of proud that I try, I would love him to be proud that I can actually make it down the mountain without crying.

Is there anything you don't really like but you'll do it because your spouse likes it?

Evolution is dumb: The proof

2009-02-19T21:48:00.005-06:00

In a discussion about God creating the earth, nine year old Kid Two asked me about evolution. He knew it was absurd but he couldn't defend his reasons well. Today he must have figured it out because this was one of the first things he said when he got home from school,

...

Mom, here's the deal. Of COURSE God made people and we didn't come from apes. If you look at a monkey for like... you're whole life, and never take your eyes off... well, it STILL won't have a human. No matter what.

Amen, little buddy.

If it looks like a dust bunny, and flutters like a dust bunny, chances are...

2009-02-17T16:23:00.004-06:00

uh-huh, it probably IS a dust bunny.

...

...BUT, the things I found lurking under my furniture were more like dust mammoths, and I promise one of them even talked back when I kicked it.

...

Why I was so shocked to find that much household "debris" under chairs and beds and along baseboards is a mystery, because I seriously don't remember the last time I moved a bed to vacuum underneath. shhhh. Don't tell my mother that!

...

We gently wiped down all the dust infested items and brought them to the new house. Nice and clean. You can't even tell that just 48 hours ago I could write "I [heart] Chad H" in the dust with my finger. Clean as a whistle.

...

In this moving experience I have been in prayer about a lot of things -- because I have a LOT of things going on in my life at the moment. I was expecting the Father to help a sister out on a problem here and there but He first started with all the dust on the furniture of my heart.

...

Oh seriously, let's just call it what it is. Sin.

...

Apparently I've been collecting some dust, I mean sin along the way. At first I didn't notice it but when it got so thick around my heart that I could write my name in it, I started to take notice.

...

No, I didn't do any of the "bad" stuff. ha/ha. It was the tiny things that, left unattended, multiplies and gets bigger until you need something better than Pledge to clean it.

...

Thank you Father, for wiping away worry, pride, selfishness, false securities and a lot of other dust bunnies clouding my view.

...

When is the last time you cleared out some dust bunnies around your heart?

Playing Along With Natalie's Whatev' Weekend Post

2009-02-13T08:10:00.005-06:00

Natalie has a Whatev' Weekend Post. It's the weekend and I'm pressed for time but I do have a little whatevah for you...

Name this tune...

Do you know it? I know a couple of you childhood friends have it your brains from our junior high days.
...
Whatev.
...

6-5-4-5-6-6-6
5-5-5
6-9-9
6-5-4-5-6-6-6-6-5-5-6-5-4

Our Move

2009-02-12T11:50:00.002-06:00

I've received lots of questions about our move from Facebook friends. Here's the skinny on the Heineckes. Next week when I really return to my bloggy love, I'm going to share with you some lessons learned from packing. Y'all come back now, ya hear?

This fall we decided to sell our house in an attempt to "beat the potential downward turn in the market." Eventually we'd like to get a house a little bigger for our family but we're not risky enough to chance having 2 house payments. Knowing the current economy could possibly produce lower home values we decided it was time to sell, save and wait for a good deal. A steal. A bargain. A home appointed by the King.

We are moving into a rental we own, literally a few blocks away in another neighborhood. The house is smaller and older and that's okay. We're trading our pond view for a view of Santa Fe avenue from the back yard. And you know what? I AM VERY EXCITED. EXCITED TO WAIT AND SEE WHERE GOD TAKES US NEXT. Maybe it will be in the next 45 days, 6 months or even years. It is hard to wait on the Lord sometimes but so much worse to wish you had.

This has been an excellent lesson for me in trusting the foxy Mr. in financial decisions like this. Let's just say I wasn't too chipper the first time he suggested the idea of downsizing. He has shown amazing leadership in our home and really cast the vision for the boys who have genuinely allowed the Lord to change their hearts too on the situation.

As a family we've prayed for and praised Him for the buyer of our current house, thanked God for our rental and now we are praying for His direction for our future...where ever that may be.

So, as I grout tile, wash the floors, clean grody showers and knock wasp nests from my new front porch, I pray the Father continues to teach our family about the joy of delighting ourselves in Him. May He be ALL we ever need.

The move will be completed this weekend. Yee-haw!

Thanks to Pastor JT for doing some of the handywork. He doesn't have a blog so I'll plug Mrs. Pastor JT. :)

Next week, my lessons...

Calvin Miller - think about it

2009-02-05T10:15:00.004-06:00

This quote came to mind today from a book I read about 7 years ago. Into the Depths of God, by Calvin Miller. Let it sink into your brain today.

...

"If you love the quiet retreat that you create in order to meet God, you may not love God at all but only the pointless discipline of quietness. If you love the literature of the saints more than you desire to emulate their holiness, you are too much the captive of your reading and not the servant of your Lord. If you seem to talk a lot about prayer but pray very little, you are seeking only a godly mysique and not God himself. God is never honored by our sterile fascination with him."

...

There have been seasons in life when I talk a lot about prayer. And there are seasons in life when I'm so completely entrenched in communication with my Father that little needs to be spoken aloud.

I'll not pay for those TWICE, thankyouverymuch

2009-01-31T08:30:00.005-06:00

First of all, I don't play imaginary heroes. (And honestly, this morning I can't decide if the plural of hero is with an e at the end or not. whatevah. I need coffee.) With my boys I've never played Santa, Easter Bunny or any other kind of imaginary omnipotent hero. And that was no big deal to them until they began losing teeth.

...

"Is the tooth fairy real?" they asked.

"Nope." I say, in my don't be ridiculous tone.

"Well, can we get paid for our teeth when they fall out?" Silly kids, always trying to work me for a dollar.

...

Losing teeth IS a big deal to kids...so I had to come up with a plan.

...

In our house, the Tooth Fairy is mom. And everyone knows it. If you feel you've missed out on some childhood fantasy, you can still put your tooth under your pillow and I'll put money there. For the most part, they just show up with an open palm holding a tooth and another open palm ready to be paid. But, because I'm ~~stingy, frugal,~~ brilliant, here's the way it works:

...

If you lose a tooth that never had a cavity, you get paid $1 for a small tooth and $3 for a molar. BUT, if the tooth had a cavity, you get $NADA, $ZILCH, $ZEE-HEE-RO. Because I have already paid for that tooth once.

...

How much do your kids get for losing teeth? Anyone else have a creative way to reward kids for good brushing?

We're moving, and that explains why my posts are infrequent and boring...

2009-01-22T22:07:00.002-06:00

I'm going to give you the short version of my chaotic (and yet terrrrrrific) life.

One day this fall the Mr. decided we should sell our house and move into something smaller to save a little money while we wait on a bigger house - and a good deal - to come along. Our children will not stop growing.

So that's what we did. And that's what we're doing.
And wow, what a mess it is right now in my house.

And with that, my calendar got very busy trying to collect boxes, categorize all our ~~junk~~ stuff as STORAGE or HOUSE, and carefully mark all the boxes for easy identification. (Oh, and keep some sense of normalcy in the house for the kids who come home everyday to an emptier house.)

I hate moving.
I like knowing this is the right decision for our little family.
I'd like it more if I didn't have to pack.
Plinking around on my computer doesn't make the Top 10 Things To Do on most days. Maybe next week?

Nothing to do today? Come on over. B.Y.O.Box

Anyone actually like to pack? (Not trying to recruit you, seriously - just wondering if anyone really thinks this part is fun?)

Anyone still with me? Ugh. I'm pretty e-boring these days... :)

I OD'd on Fox News

2009-01-21T05:43:00.000-06:00

On most days I do not turn on the television until late in the evening when the boys have gone to bed and the foxy Mr and I need to watch an episode of The Office, or Lost or 24. Tuesday was different.

...

I woke up to some Fox News and pretty much didn't stop until the clock demanded I take Kid Two to a soccer game. Seriously, that's enough TV news for me for the next 2 weeks - borderline overdose. (Except that LOST starts this week so I'll have to give it another go...)

...

I was certainly grateful nothing catastrophic occurred during the ceremony. Good job, fellow Americans. Nice self-control. :)

...

He doesn't have to be my favorite president, but he IS my president. This was the best blog post I read today. It captured my thoughts exactly.

...

And you? Did you watch the inauguration? Did anyone watch more Fox News than I did? (Please say yes and make me feel better...) What were your initial thoughts?

...

(It was either politics or aprons today. I'm low on good stories about my life...)

...

You thought I was going to link the word aprons to www.PinkLicorice.net, didn't you? Come on, I don't self-promote everyday... :)

Let me do you a favor today

2009-01-16T05:26:00.005-06:00

Let me do you a favor today, okay? There are two websites I visit to get the skinny on good deals and great products. You should take a trip to these two places in particular today...

...

Christi's 2 Cents - She is a friend in my Bible study and always has some great shopping deals available for the penny-pincher in all of us. A couple of her links sent some free stuff on its way to my house recently! I love free. Hurry on over and check her out. GO!

Consumer Queen - This gal works with the Mr. and also has a very cool website. She does a lot of product reviews, hosts giveaways and informs readers about all kinds of deals and steals! Wednesday night she was interviewed by our local news channel! Go check out this site today too!

You can see her interview here. And you might even learn how to start getting your own free stuff! WHOA!....Before you decide you don't have time for this, can I just "mention" she is wearing the most adorable apron?... Yeah, I heard it was made by Pink Licorice. [and the crowd goes wild...WILD, I tell ya.]

...

I promise I won't turn this into a "buy my apron" site but come on, when you're anonymously featured on the news, you gotta tell someone! :)

Mom, I like this girl...

2009-01-14T22:20:00.003-06:00

For the second time this week, my 11-1/2 year old son has said to me, "Mom, I like this girl..." and then he goes on to ask me a question or two about "liking girls." While the Invisible Me DESPERATELY wants to squint my eyes and point my boney little finger in his face and demand he "keep it in his pants until he's got a legal Mrs.", I realize that is not at all necessary at this stage in the game. It's possible the Invisible Me overreacts from time to time.

...

He just wants to know if it's okay to like her.

...

Oh man, here we go. A new chapter in life. Close the one that starts "Someday you'll like girls and..." and open the one that begins, "Now that you're older..."

...

I'll not share his side of the conversation. He's older now, and that's private.

...

This morning at Bible Study, Robin mentioned how we read the word over and over and over and at the right time, the Spirit calls to mind the word we may need to share with someone else. That someone else is often one of my precious guys.

...

I reminded him again that this girl he likes has already been picked out to be someone's wife. And most likely, given what I know about life, it may not be him. But she already belongs to someone. Likewise, I told him he already has a wife waiting to belong to him someday.

...

I wish you could have seen his eyes light up at the realization that God already has the love of his life chosen - and that somewhere in this world, a mom and dad are praying for Kid One to love their daughter with all of his heart. I've told him before about his future wife but tonight he started to get it. I hope he remembers that for the rest of his life.

...

So much more of that conversation I would love to share with you, but I can't. Bummer.

...

He scurried off to bed and I just stood in the hallway and wiped my now-wet cheeks. I was reminded of the importance of praying for the wives of my sons. I haven't done that enough - and it's serious business.

...

Do you pray for the spouses of your children? Do you pray with them for their future spouse? It matters. It matters big time.

...

(Thanks for my mom and my mother in law for time spent praying for Chad and I.)

Kind of a BFF Sweat Shop

2009-01-12T21:52:00.003-06:00

Before Christmas I caught the sewing bug and started making aprons...lots of them, thanks to some of you! Short ones, full ones, and ruffled ones. So much fun.

Natalie, being my BFF, came over to lend a hand in the makeshift sweat shop. (We don't really work that hard, mind you.) I wanted to show you how the operation went down.

First, Pastor JT dropped of his little Mrs. who brought me one of these. A good dose of caffeine got the creative juices going!

This is me drinking my little treat and probably bossing Natalie around while I work on a cute ruffly number.

This used to be my dining room which was transformed into the "shop." Kid Three also has his toys strung from one end of the house to the other...

This is Natalie's OFFICE. She was the most wonderful Chief Ironing Executive ever in the history of pressed fabric.

And among the finished products that day? These.

And thanks to all of you who participated in the giveaway and ordered aprons for Christmas, I launched this:

www.pinklicorice.net

The pesky laundry hamper

2009-01-11T21:59:00.003-06:00

I'm in the market for a new laundry hamper - a laundry hamper than can act right and be obedient - one that doesn't play dodgeball when you throw clothes into it.

...

Yes I'm sure it's the hamper. It can't be my kids...

They're perfect. [insert mischievious grin]

I'm sure it's the hamper, moving side to side and closing its lid at precisely the moment dirty shirts are hurled into the air toward it.

I'm sure it's hamper, being only half full and yet coughing up jeans and jammies onto the floor so I'll have to bend down and scoop them up.

I'm sure it's the hamper, that venomous, cantakerous hamper.
It can't be my kids.

They would NEVER just throw their clothes on the floor when the laundry hamper is so close...so very, very close.

NEVER.

Battleship - Nuclear Twist

2009-01-05T22:05:00.006-06:00

Seriously. Unless you're playing this game with someone who can no longer demonstrate their age using 2 hands, this game is going to be painfully slow. Distrubingly, painfully, ridiculously slow.

,,,

Kid Two wanted to play a game with me tonight. Okay. I feel like kicking some minor hinnie in a friendly game of whatever. Yes, sounds good, Kid Two. I'll play.

,,,

Battleship is the game of choice and I know what that means. He's better than he used to be but still, this game is destined to send one of us to the ledge.

,,,

A-5 miss.

G-7 miss.

C-1 miss.

B-9 miss.

J-2 HIT!

Oh finally.

,,,

And for the next too-many-turns we struggle to sink something, anything.

,,,

My eyes are getting heavy and I'm tired of saying, "come on honey, it's your turn...no you guessed that one already...yes, it's still your turn..."

,,,

And then I get an idea. A grinch like idea. And without any further thought I'm sure I can sell this one ane end my tour of duty on the plastic ocean.

,,,

What this game needs are nuclear weapons. No one survives a nuclear weapon. No one.

,,,

Kid Two, I've got an idea. Let's make up our own rules tonight. Each of us now has 3 nuclear weapons we can use at any time. If you choose to use a Nuke, you must announce it on your turn and if you hit ANYTHING you automatically win the game because you essentially blow up the whole ocean and everyone sinks...all.my.ships.included. (I no longer care if I win this game.)

,,,

The crowd goes wild and he thinks I'm brilliant. The Invisible Me braces for DefCon level 10 and I cross my fingers, toes and eyes for good luck. This game will hopefully be over in less than 3 moves by one of us.

,,,

Nuke, A-8 miss.

Nuke, H-10 miss.

Nuke, A-1 HIT! Game over.

,,,

He's right. I am brilliant.

,,,

And there you have it. A sure-fire way to cut a grueling game of Battleship short and disguise your boredom.

,,,

You're welcome.

Who needs Dick Clark?

2009-01-04T15:54:00.004-06:00

December 31.

New Year's Eve used to be oh-so-exciting when I was ten, and sixteen and even twenty-five. But now as a real, live grown up, it really isn't all that fantastic anymore. Know what I'm saying?

...

We rolled in from Colorado around 5pm after a 12 hour drive starting at 4 in the A.M. The house was still spotless with sweeper marks in the carpet (because EVERYONE knows that's how you leave a house when you go on vacation - can I get an amen?!) and we were beyond grocery-less. There may have been a stale cracker or some furry green bread but not much more than that. We opted for Chinese food to get us through until the next day.

...

Throughout the whole dinner all I could think of was how tired I was and how I couldn't wait to get home and do n.o.t.h.i.n.g. and maybe do it in front of the television all snuggled under my hot blanket. The thought of my Geriatric-Rockin-New-Year's-Eve-Party made me as excited as a teenager with a curfew extenstion on this once a year event.

...

We raced home by 6.30, bathed baby and put him to beddy-bye an hour early. (He had it coming.) Then I treated myself to an almost-too-hot-to-handle bath. Bubbles and all.

Once I was smellin all squeaky clean and pretty again, the Foxy Mr and I jumped into bed, watched a movie and fell asleep before 10pm. I'm not even sure we remembered to say good night or turn the light off. REM sleep before you could snap a finger. Bliss.

...

I woke up surprised to find the new year made it's way to Oklahoma without the watchful eye of the Heineckes. The ball dropped, the couples kissed, some ate black-eyed peas while others helped themselves to a little too much nog. But us? We thumbed our noses at Mr. Dick Clark and his NYE celebration. And it was seriously the best New Year's Eve ~~Party~~ Un-Party ever.

...

Happy New Year everyone! (5 days late, oh-well)

...

For those of you who managed to remain faithful to my Favorites Party on Tuesdays, you are terrific. We left town, I left my computer and haven't touched Google reader in about 2 weeks...

...

One more thing...my apron business took off before Christmas - I've got some new stuff for you (on another site later this week) - Stay close for Valentine's Day specials!

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-25T20:43:00.002-06:00

The five of us are headed to Colorado to spend time with family. I'll talk at you the first of January. Can you believe I got so busy I forgot my own blog party on Tuesday? It was a good kind of busy.

Have a great weekend!

Why are they laughing?

2008-12-18T21:09:00.004-06:00

My kids... I told them to go to bed. At least five times I must have said it.

They finally left the living room and 10 minutes later I heard them laughing in the other room. Ugh! I was done being mom and ready to shut this show down and sit mindlessly watching a little TV until the Mr. gets home. But, I had to go investigate and growl a little so they'd go to sleep.

The laughter got louder as I entered their room. This is what they found so funny. Kid Two would read one and then wild laughter would errupt. Repeat about a million times... I'll admit, I laughed too -- not so much because it was funny, but because THEY found it so entertaining.

How Dumb Is He?
He tried to buy a garage at a garage sale.
He thought the English Channel was between HBO and Nickelodeon.
He went to a drive-in to see "Closed for Winter."
He flunked recess.
He went cordless bungee-jumping.

How Dumb Is She?
She threw her ball on the ground, and missed.
She got her gold medal bronzed.
She wanted to know how many One-A-Day vitamins to take.
She asked for the number of 911.
She put her iPod in the oven because she wanted hot tunes.
She took the Pepsi challenge and chose Skippy.

The funniest part? They were laughing hysterically but didn't even get the last one.

I love those guys.

Free Breakfast for a Year...that's 365 days, y'all!

2008-12-16T22:19:00.005-06:00

Raise your hand if you like breakfast! I.love.it. It's my favorite meal of the day and if I could convince my family, we'd eat it for dinner twice a week.

---

How would you like a FREE breakfast for a year? Well, someone's going to win. Might as well be YOU!

Check out ConsumerQueen.com for the 7 Ways You Can Win free breakfast for a year. Consumer Queen has a TON of information for saving money, giveaways, product reviews and consumer resources to give you a money-saving edge!

Fast Fixin produces terrific convenience foods at a great value. They are offering 15 winners free product for a year! And...while you're waiting to win in January, sign up to be a Fast Fixin Fanatic and get free product coupons.

I have personally tried each one of these products. Our family loves them. I'm not sure they are available in all areas, but check your local Walmart. Kid Two is crazy about the Eggs N Pancakes in particular and I've even overheard him "selling" the neighbor kid. My favorite is the Southwest Omelet!

The Foxy Mr. works for Advance Brands, the company producing Fast Fixin and Fast Classics food items. Okay, OKAY, he had a little something to do [which means BIG] with the launch of this line, it's true. He's sooo cool that way. Cool AND foxy. Dang. If I weren't married to him, I'd wish I were. :)

Given the fact he is the Fast Classics Brand Manager, we probably can't win the year of breakfast but maybe one of you will win...and you'll invite me over for coffee and a Fast Fixin Breakfast Wrap and stimulating conversation (where you'll beg to see pictures of my kids). I'm there.

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Find out how you can serve up a hot breakfast everyday for your troops!
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By the way, do you know what would look good with all that breakfast? You guessed it. An apron. But of course.

The Apron Winner & FAVORITES PARTY! - Christmas Tradition

2008-12-15T21:44:00.005-06:00

First things first... the winner of the apron giveaway is..... Bunny B! See the short video below.

I look so tired in this video, because I am. If I worked at it, I could look a little more refreshed but I've been in my makeshift "factory" all day. And since I was working the camera, all I managed to show you of the apron I was wearing was the waistband. Professional apronista, amateur videographer. Oh well. You can't have it all, it's true.

More aprons coming soon. I'm booked up for Christmas orders (If you've already contacted me - I gotcha, no worries!)

Now...on to today's FAVORITES PARTY topic! - Favorite Christmas Tradition.

Since the Foxy Mr. has been in the picture we've had a tradition of sweet family time over a big breakfast casserole. The boys are old enough they don't scurry out of bed too early to open gifts. I've never been a fan of "get up at the crack of dawn to make a mess in the living room." Ugh. By 9am, you're already cleaning house!

At a reasonable hour of the morning we gather together to first spend some good family time talking about our year and the "state of our family". The account of Jesus' birth is read from the Bible and we talk about it. Each year the discussions go a little deeper. It's fun to watch the boys growing up and gaining a better understanding of God.

After a while, we exchange gifts. For the final gift we put together a scavenger hunt that takes them all over the house looking for clues. Each year the scavenger hunt gets a little more challenging. This year they have requested to keep all of their gifts hidden and have a scavenger hunt for each one. "And make them HARD clues," they said. "Not things like 'Go look in Kid Three's closet.' We want to have to work at it." I took that as a challenge to outsmart those two this year. I hope I don't disappoint! I'm going to need to get started soon to make it a good one. Maybe I'll post one of the clues on my blog... The things a girl does to get her family to read the blog...

What are some of your favorite Christmas traditions?

Weekend Giveaway - Aprons, Aprons, Aprons!

2008-12-11T17:07:00.010-06:00

Need a last minute gift for a favorite girlfriend?

...

Think APRONS!

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For quite a while I've been wearing an apron in the kitchen. It makes me feel like I'm a real grown up. (Yes, apparently I need props for this.) When the kids come home from school and I'm wearning my apron, I'm more likely to feel like making them a snack. When guests arrive for dinner, I like having one on because it gives the illusion I've been slaving over the stove - just for them. I'm a professional wife and mom, and frankly, an apron just helps me feel like it.

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So, lucky you - I'm giving one away next week to kick off my business venture and provide you with a little holiday cheer!

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Giveaway Entry...

Leave a comment telling me which of the three styles you like best and you get 1 chance. Between Friday 12/12 and Monday night 12/15, either write a post about the apron giveaway or at least mention it somewhere on your blog (with a link to this post, please) and you'll get 3 chances! (Leave me comment to let me know you gave me some free advertising). The Foxy Mr. will draw from the entries on Monday night and the winner will be announced on Tuesday, 12/16.

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Want to know what you're playing for?

This.

I call it Bag of Skittles. It's a Hand Towel Half-Apron - great for a quick dry of the hands without getting your whole apron wrinkled and wet. (Yes, I know that's what aprons are for, but come on, no one wants to look frumpy in an apron.) All half-aprons are lined and have long ties so you can make a cute bow on your backside!

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I hope you all win!!!!! Wait, that wouldn't be much of a business, would it?!

If you're interested in purchasing one, email me for more information or color preferences. These are the styles currently available but I've got tons of fabric options!

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Reversible Full Aprons - These full aprons hit around the knee and are reversible. One side has a pocket. The apron has long ties so you can wrap them back around to the front or make a bow in the back.

Ruffled Half-Apron - Oh, these are cute. This is perfect for the chick who may not cook from scratch but wants to look foxy in the kitchen! A great hostess gift for your holiday party! 4 ruffles in coordinating fabrics.

My Apron website is coming soon...and so is Valentine's Day. Just putting a bug in your ear. What little bug? What did you say? ...Buy an apron? ...Oh, good idea, little bug. Splendid idea.

View a sample of fabric options here.

Update: 12/17 - I'm not taking any more new orders before Christmas. (I don't think...) Email me for 2009 prices and fabric options if you're interested!

Giveaway TO-MOR-ROW.

2008-12-11T09:02:00.003-06:00

I know, I know. Why not today? Because... I have yet to take pictures of the little bag of awesome I'll be giving away. So, come back tomorrow and find out how you can win something girly.

I've been really busy with a little business venture so I haven't been on the web for several days. The Foxy Mr. is traveling next week so maybe I'll let the laundry hang out in the living room for the night, all crumpled up but clean, and I'll read and read and read blogs. Perhaps I'll find the answers to all of my conundrums in this life! I'm counting on you all to be so very wise for me!

Also! Next Tuesday's Favorites Party topic is FAVORITE CHRISTMAS TRADITION. You knew that one was eventually coming. It should be oh-so-easy for some of you. Anyone dress up like elves and ding-dong-ditch the neighbors? Yeah, we don't either...but wouldn't that be fun?

See you tomorrow!

FAVORITES PARTY! - Favorite Kid Stories

2008-12-08T21:56:00.003-06:00

Happy Tuesday!

It's our third week of the Favorites Party. I'm looking forward to your favorite kid stories! Be sure to check out these other links for more good laughs!

Kid Two has always been great for a laugh (or a panic attack, or a few frayed nerves!). Since he could talk he has been entertaining us both with funny things he's said and several things I can't believe he said!

My favorite Kid Two story occurred one evening after an "altercation" of sorts with him. He was about five and very sparky. SPARKY, I tell ya. Wow. Never a dull moment with that little guy.

I had just finished a holy moment "laying on of hands" as I "trained him in the way he should go" if you know what I mean... He sat on his bed and cried as I tried to talk to him and explain why he had to be spanked but seriously, at age 5, it wasn't always easy. But discipline never is.

Honey, I love you.

"I know," he said sniffing and never making eye contact. They were mad tears, not sad ones. "love you too" he said, but he didn't make a very compelling case for his sentiment.

I love you more, more more! I was trying to play the little back and forth game we would do, trying to "outlove" the other one. He apparently didn't want to play at the moment, because with all the sarcasm a 5 year old could muster, he raised just his eyes to meet mine, never losing the scowl on his face he said, "You probably do."

Ouch. That hurt, kid.

That is the same kid who once told me he loved me all the way up to God...with his hair sticking straight up! (Infinity PLUS hair?! Awesome.)

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Share a favorite kid story, (or link to a previous post). I love to laugh at the small people. :)

My Mom

2008-12-03T06:00:00.000-06:00

My mom lives about 100 miles from me. Tuesday morning she rang my doorbell BEFORE 8am to spend the day with me to celebrate my birthday. I had the pancakes buttered and ready! She showed up with a fun present for me and this:

However, when the boys got home from school it looked like this... [I may have helped them with some of it. I'm old. I can't remember. I plead the 5th amendment...] I forgive them.

I loved that she took a day off work to drive at the crack of dawn to do whatever I wanted. No fussy plans. No expectations. Just spending time with me because I'm her baby. Her favorite baby. [That was just to get a rise out of my little sister. I love her.]

We ~~kicked the boys to the bus stop~~ said good bye to the big boys and quickly got busy on our day of unplanned fun. She helped me do a couple of little things around the house and then we headed out for a little Christmas shopping. Just an easy day with my favorite mentor.

Let me give you a dozen reasons my mom is the greatest chick ever...

1. She plays the accordion VERY well. Growing up I remember laying in bed at night, listening to her play hymns. My sister and I would yell out from the other room, "Play #157" and she'd strike up a little Victory in Jesus!

2. She is my FREE counselor when I need to be talked off the ledge.

3. She is the reason I experienced God at a young age. No one lived a more selfless, God honoring life in front of me growing up.

4. She can't tell a story without useless details and at this point, I don't want her to.

5. She chews 1/2 piece of gum at a time. I don't know why. Gum is cheap

6. She makes the best brisket in the history of red meat.

7. She believes "forever" is more than just a fairytale.

8. She is a servant to the bone. Need help with the kids? Mom will do it. Someone at church needs a meal? Mom will cook it. Run you to the airport? Mom will take you. What.ev.ah. you need.

9. When I was young she would sew dresses for me and my sister. [Why did we ALWAYS have to dress alike?!] Then she would sew little doll dresses for our "babies" so they would match us.

10. She hasn't quite mastered "leave a comment" on my blog but she sends me the sweetest notes when if I write something good.

11. She can rat hole money better than anyone I know. She's always got a few $20s tucked away for a special occasion.

12. She digs Jack Bauer. puleez. who doesn't?

What about your mom?
Give us a couple of fun facts!

FAVORITES PARTY! - My Favorite Gift

2008-12-01T21:00:00.005-06:00

Welcome back for the second week of our Favorites Party! I loved your Thanksgiving posts last week! Now, on to our FAVORITE GIFTS!

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First of all, today/Tuesday is my birthday (and the crowd goes wild) and no matter what kind of old or new math you use, I am undoubtedly now in my late 30s. And 'sokay, I'm good with it.

,,,

I've had sooo many good gifts in my life that it's hard to narrow it down. There is one in particular that stands out even though the gift was small and most people may not have given it a second thought. It still gives me the happiest feeling to remember this event.

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At the time I was single with two kids and the Foxy Mr. [who then was just the Foxy Manfriend] was just beginning to come to terms with the facts as I had explained them to him, which were: You ARE going to spend the rest of your life with me, you just have not yet accepted it. (He was kind of a tough sell at times.)

,,,

We had dinner out with several of my friends one weekend and then went back to my house to visit for a while. (I can't really call it "hanging out" anymore like we did when we were 22. It's much more sophisticated in your 30s....right....) It was around my birthday but that really wasn't the reason for our get together. Maybe it was an early Christmas party or something. Who knows.

,,,

The Foxy Mr. had surprised me by bringing a cake to celebrate my birthday.

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You might be thinking "so what?" Lemme 'splain. That kind of thing, even though it seems trivial, didn't happen to me a lot, if ever.

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As a single mom I had a brain full of irrational concerns that I might not ever be someone's favorite girl like I desired to be. I sometimes worried I would never know what it felt like to have a man really lay down his life for me and cherish me. I wanted a man to make a little extra effort for me. Simply put, I wanted to feel loved.

,,,

The birthday cake, a Raspberries and Cream ribbon cake, was the most beautiful and tasty cake in the world that night. I know it seems silly that a birthday dessert can mean so much but seriously, I was so impressed that he would go to the trouble to drive across town, pick up a cake and surprise me. It had fresh flowers on the top (what girl doesn't like fresh flowers?) and the yummiest icing. And it was round. (I think a round cake is classy. Maybe that's weird, just go with it.)

,,,

Once everyone left I sat down at my kitchen table by myself and just looked at what was left of the cake. I picked off the roses and some greenery from the top. Pressing them between pieces of waxed paper in an attempt to preserve the sentiment I was reminded that my God hears the prayers of his children. My desire to be a Godly wife to a Godly man had not been forgotten. It was only a matter of His timing.

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Every time I eat a cake from that bakery I think of the time I was caught off guard by a sweet display of love from my favorite guy.

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PS. Dear Foxy Mr., in case you actually read my blog post today, the truth is, YOU are my most favorite gift. Ever.
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For other Favorite Gift posts, visit these links!

Facebook

2008-11-30T16:42:00.002-06:00

Seriously, I must be dumb.

Everyone I know has a Facebook account and y'all, I just don't get it.

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I have a Facebook login and, I guess, a page because I had to do all that in order to see my sister-in-law's pictures of the kids. But I never went back... until my Life Group girls informed me "everyone" is doing it. All of a sudden I felt like I was in high school and for whatever reason, I felt compelled to get myself back to Facebook and be cool.

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I went back and saw who has become friends with who - or whom, whatever. Meredith wished me an early birthday, (thank you) and Cindy and I traded digs over the Sooner win this weekend. Then I clicked (somehow) and got to a wall...and then managed to click on "find some friends" and viola! all my email contacts appeared with their cute little picture along the side. Clickety, click, click... I invited lots of people to be my friend. Now I guess I wait and see what happens.

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But still, I can Twitter but I'm not sure I can Facebook.

And you? Do you have a Facebook page? What's all the fuss?

...

E.d.u.c.a.t.e. M.e.

Thanksgiving Favorites!

2008-11-24T16:37:00.010-06:00

Well, gobble, gobble, gobble! It's only 2 more days until Turkey Day -- when we sit around the table with friends and family to eat and talk and tell the same stories we tell every year! The guys watch football and the girls clean the kitchen and laugh together. I love it.

I'm so glad you joined today for the first Tuesday of our FAVORITES PARTY! Today I can't wait to hear about your Thanksgiving favorite!

One of my favorite Thanksgiving things.....

Little Pilgrims & Turkey Crafts

Is there anything more adorable than little kids dressed up like Pilgrims? Hardly! This little pilgrim is my Kid Two a couple of years ago. Look how sweet [and innocent] he appears to be.

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I attended his 1st Grade Thanksgiving Feast where we ate all kinds of finger foods that had been breathed on and handled by nineteen first graders...mmmmm. My favorite was his "hand turkey" on which he had written all the things for which he was thankful: God, Love, Mom, Dad, Brother. I'll bet the original pilgrims had a similar list.

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I couldn't get him to agree to the costume this year for nostalgia. Selfish little pilgrim...

Visit these other blogs to read more Thanksgiving favorites!

Sweet Treat & "Favorites Party" Reminder

2008-11-23T21:44:00.010-06:00

Happy Turkey Week! Tuesday is the first day of our FAVORITES PARTY! Be sure to come back Tuesday, bright and early (maybe late Monday night for you over-achievers wanting to be first on Mr. Linky) to link your post!

This week's FAVORITE assignment: Thanksgiving! Gobble, gobble, gobble!

Tell us about your favorite Thanksgiving tradition, food, game... or maybe your favorite story about when Uncle Larry ate too much turkey and popped the button off his pants...or when the dog knocked the turkey onto the floor and you had to eat hot dogs... or whatever!

Thanks to these folks for posting the Blog Party button - Natalie, Runningmama, Nicole, Meredith, Liz, Jenny.

Now a little something for today... Flavored Steamers

While there's no scientific evidence to support the myth warm milk helps you fall asleep, it doesn't mean the idea of warm milk isn't relaxing! Kid Three will take his warm milk any way he can get it around 7.30. Kid One is o-u-t on the hot cow water but Kid Two and I share a special treat from time to time -- flavored milk steamers -- a little twist on the sugary hot chocolate drink.

**6 oz low fat / no fat milk, microwaved for about 45-60 seconds (or warmed on the stove if you're blessed with that much patience)

**1 tablespoon liquid coffee creamer - your favorite flavor

**Stir and sip it while you wind down for the day

Our favorite "stir-ins" - Pumpkin Spice, Caramel Apple

See you tomorrow. It's going to be my FAVORITE day of this week!

Guitar Hero Wanna-Be

2008-11-18T15:52:00.005-06:00

Kid Three enjoyed watching his dad play a little Guitar Hero a couple of months ago. Sweet carpet dance skills, baby...

(1:12 in length)

Rockband Baby from KIm Heinecke on Vimeo.

Blog Party Tuesdays!

2008-11-17T22:08:00.005-06:00

Can you believe this year is rapidly coming to a close? Wow, that was fast! To celebrate the last few weeks of 2008, we're going to have a little blog party and share our favorite things. And since it's my party, I get to pick the topics. I hope you'll join the gig.

Each Tuesday through December, I'll host a Mr. Linky and you write some fabulous blog post to educated the world. Now, remember how some of you punked Natalie and I on our BFF How-To Video contest? Let's not let that happen again. I'll get a complex for sure...and then I'd be forced to do a screen print of my Google Analytics traffic counter just to prove there are more readers than just my mom and dad. Sad, I know. Don't throw me into therapy this close to the holidays. That's what family is for. (Did I say that out loud?! Kidding, of course.) Kind of.

Ready? Okay, I'll take your decision to continue reading as a committment to participate.

NEXT Tuesday - Write a blog post about your favorite "something" about Thanksgiving. Maybe a favorite memory, your favorite food, your favorite "after Thanksgiving" shopping tradition... Just give us a favorite "anything" about Thanksgiving. I'm counting on someone to teach me something new or at least entertaining!

Each Tuesday is a different post about a favorite "something." Maybe I'll throw in a hokie one or two - just to keep it spicy.

Don't worry, I'll remind you on Monday so you don't have that blank look on Tuesday like you forgot to read the book for your book report.

Grab the Favorites Party button on the left if you want or link it in your post each week.

Who's playing? Let's see what brilliance you wrote today - about anything, before the party starts next week...

Let this rattle you today

2008-11-16T20:41:00.003-06:00

I'm reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan, recommended by a friend recently. I suspect Pastor Craig has read it too, based on the current message series. It is challenging me and rattling me in a necessary way.

Chan quotes John Piper (who is awesome, by the way) from his book God is the Gospel, in which the quoted author asks whether we are in love with God:

"The critical question for our generation - and for every generation - is this: If you could have heaven, with no sickness and with all the friends you ever had on earth, and all the food you ever liked, and all the leisure activities you ever enjoyed, and all the natural beauties you ever saw, and all the physical pleasures you ever tasted, and no human conflict or any natural disasters, could you be satisfied with heaven if Christ was not there?"

No comments today.

Just give it some thought.

You may need to read it again.

I did.

Indian Food. And I'm NOT Talking About the Cuisine of the Five Civilized Tribes

2008-11-14T06:00:00.001-06:00

Wednesday evening I attended a cooking class at our local Vo-Tech with my MIL. Knowing she has an affection for Indian food I thought this might be a fun way to thank her for watching Kid Three during Bible study this fall.

Our instructor, Sitara (maybe that was her name?), was a lovely Indian lady who apparently is skilled in the ~~art~~ ridiculousness of Feng Shui and Numerology as well as cooking. MIL and I both passed on those discussions. Forget the new age hocus-pocus -- we had been lured there with high expectations for an educational feast.

And a feast it was, indeed.

I already knew I didn't like curry (which isn't a particular spice but rather refers to spicy Indian dishes of many kinds) yet I maintained an open mind hoping I may enjoy it this time. I wasn't entirely prepared to handle all those Indian spices... Cumin, Turmeric, and Garam Masala. Let's just say I will be ever-so-violently scribbling through those on my grocery list, especially Garam Masala, the grand nemesis to my happy tastebuds. Maybe these are good individually but combined - not good for me.

The class was fun. I really enjoyed watching her cook for us and tell all about Indian food but I started to get nervous. Not only did she add a very healthy dose of the spices, she added about sixty jalapeno peppers...seeds and all. (It may have been slightly fewer than sixty, my eyes were watering and nose was running so I could have been a little distracted.)

The aroma of all that food cooking was wonderful so naturally when it came time to go through the buffet line I was duped into thinking I suddenly liked Indian cuisine so I didn't deny myself a good portion.

You might be surprised to know it doesn't help to blow on your food to reduce the hot and spicy sensation opening every sinus cavity you never knew you had. Temperature aside, this stuff was HOT. I downed two glasses of water in no time trying to douse the flames of the 6 alarm fire on my tongue.

Not wanting to be disrespectful to the cooking host I did my best to eat what I could and "rearrange" the rest on my plate to give the appearance I had devoured it! Thankfully, my MIL leaned over and relocated some of my Aloo Mater to her plate. (Thank.you.)

The class participants had to clean up and then it was time for dessert. The Invisible Me d.e.s.p.e.r.a.t.e.l.y. begged for a 9 x 13 pan of Duncan Hines double fudge, still-kinda-gooey-in-the-middle brownies. (Yeah, the whole pan.) But I settled for a square of Raas Malai (you know, baked ricotta cheese & sugar with crushed cardamom seeds. Not brownies.)

I went home with an appreciation for Indian food even if I didn't share the same affection for it as the others in the class -- some of them were downright giddy. I also went home with indigestion and a special rumbling in my tummy signaling there may be repercussions from such a cross-cultural indulgence...

Tonight at the Heinecke house, we'll be having an all American dinner of chicken in which no one will need to use their shirt sleeve to satisfy a runny nose because of spicy food. And for dessert? Do you even have to ask? Brownies, baby. Brownies.

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It really was a fun adventure!

Are you a fan of Indian food?

Hey, that's MY kid you're pushing around

2008-11-13T06:00:00.000-06:00

Kid One just finished his first year of tackle football. I aways thought it would be fun to watch him in this sport yet I found it to be a little tougher than I expected. When they dogpiled to sacrifice their bodies for the ball I wanted to see them leap up FAST to prove no bones are broken which silenced the parental gasps from the crowd every time the whistle was blown.

"Hit em low, hit em hard" so goes the battle cry from the sidelines. I'm kinda okay with that until I heard the OTHER team saying it! During the game the Invisible Me pounced on every kid who pushed my baby around. I've imaginarily (let's pretend that is a word) whipped more juveniles since August than I can count. Once I made an invisible kid cry. And his little brother. True.

While I enjoyed seeing him come home all sweaty, dirty and reciting all the plays from begining to end, I didn't like watching him (and his teammates) get shoved around and all bruised up. I just knew someone was going to call DHS on me one day. It looked like I beat him up reeeallll nice like. (Let's get one thing clear. IF I had beat him up AND I DID NOT, MIND YOU I would have won. That's how tough IN MY MIND I am.)

Whew. The season is over and I need a rest.

What have your kids done that once seemed like fun...until they started doing it?

Kid Two on Career Choices

2008-11-11T22:49:00.004-06:00

Kid Two: Mom, when I grow up what should I be?

Me: Hmmmm. Interesting question, Kid Two. How about a zookeeper?

No.

How about a ninja so you can karate chop things or a barber so YOU can decide how long someone's hair should be?

No. Those aren't really any good. [You don't say.]

Lawnboy? Chef? Realtor?

No. All dumb ideas, Mom. I want a job that I will love.

Guitar player? Javlin-ist? President?

Mom!

Well, honey, why don't you just change the world with the word of God.

[Short silence. He's thinking. And he's serious]

Yeah, that's a great idea. I'll just do that.

[Exit Kid Two from the room.]

I'll just do that? he says.

Oh Father, please give him a heart to pick your Word as his passion of choice.

Please.

Pesky Telemarketers: How To Keep Them Calling

2008-11-09T21:28:00.004-06:00

After an exhaustive day, you sit down to a nice quiet dinner with friends and family. Only two bites into the meal the phone rings. “Out of Area” displays on your caller ID but you pick up the phone anyway. The same curiosity that killed the cat lures you to abandon your guests to unveil the mystery caller. The unfamiliar voice blurts out, “Hello, Mr. Hin-… Hinnkie…um, Mr. Heinecke?”

,,,

Another butchered attempt at your last name.

Another annoying interruption.

Another pesky telemarketer.

I've been in this business on one level or another for over 15 years. (Yes, that's 10+5 and it's been a good job.) And because I like you, I'm going to give you some insider secrets on how to keep them calling. (I know, I helped you with popcorn last week and now this?! )

ggg
Follow these simple rules and you’ll never be without an opportunity to buy something you don’t need over the phone.

Never answer the phone. Although you may successfully avoid the initial battle of wills with a telemarketer, you cannot escape the incessant ring. Most automated dialing systems used by telemarketing agencies recycle busy signals, answering machines and unanswered calls. Technology allows for the phone number to be dialed at various times of the day to maximize agencies’ efforts to reach you. You can dodge the conversation but you cannot easily stifle the ringing. Let the phone ring and ring and ring. They’ll keep calling.

Pretend you’re not home. If you answer the phone and pretend the person for whom they are seeking is nowhere in sight, your number will be recycled for calling. You may be asked to provide the best time to call back. Watch out! If you offer a call back time you’ll help the telemarketer pinpoint the optimal time to hunt for you. You can undoubtedly expect another call soon, whether it is in an hour, a day or perhaps a week, if you’re lucky. Pretend you’re not home. They’ll keep calling.

Tell them you’re busy. If you think you can ward off a telemarketing call by pretending to be too busy, you’re wrong. In theory, squabbling children, sitting down for dinner or walking out the door are all great excuses for exiting a call. Be careful. It does not always work that way. The pitch is always the same – just three minutes of your time for the deal of your life – and they will take those three minutes now or later. If you suggest the caller try you again at a better time, they will. Telemarketers are the most dependable work force when it comes to returning calls. Tell them you’re busy. They’ll keep calling.

Decline the offer delicately. Rejecting a telemarketing offer does not have to be rude to be effective but it does have to be clear. If you’re not interested in what they are selling, just politely say so and do it beyond question. Many people are too soft when it comes to refusing a telephone offer. Comments such as “Not right now” “Maybe some other time,” or “I need to think about it” are signals to the caller that you could be persuaded in the future. You can be pleasantly firm and avoid a follow up call for the same offer by saying no – and meaning it. Try this, "I am not interested. Please take me off of your list. Thank you. [click]" If you can’t be clear in your refusal just be wishy-washy about your interest. They’ll keep calling.

Avoid non-solicitation lists. Nearly every state has laws governing telemarketing agencies and their marketing practices. There are national non-solicitation lists to which you can subscribe and curb the number of calls you receive. These lists are offered to the public free of charge and serve to protect consumers from abusive telemarketing practices. While placing your name on a non-solicitation list will not stop all incoming calls, it will eliminate many of them. Avoid the non-solicitation lists. They’ll keep calling.

In a society where companies tirelessly battle for your business you can take control -- or follow these steps and be sure they’ll keep calling.

,,,

And on a more personal note - There are a lot of companies giving telemarketing a very bad name. I'm proud to say my group works very hard to be the exception and provide a good service to our clients and their customers.

I need to sweat the small stuff

2008-11-06T14:42:00.004-06:00

There are plenty of things on the list about myself that bug me.

...I don't like roller coasters.

...I really can't play sports.

...I don't like peas. (I'll swallow them whole to make a point to my kids.)

...

There is one personal character flaw in particular that drives me crazy.

...I will sometimes procrastinate things that are not hard or require very little effort. Seriously, it's not the big things that get me, it's the small stuff.

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By nature I'm pretty organized and on the ball. I love a checklist and structure. However, from time to time I find myself putting off things I need to do. And mind you, they won't be big things either. They are small, sometimes low priority things that start to make me insane.

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For example: (and sadly, this one goes back a LONG time as my parents could verify) I will have a stack of library books that need to be returned. I'll probably think about it several times before the due date but for whatever reason, I just won't take them back on time. Movie rentals are the same way.

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I have a list of people I need to call or things I need to do. I know these won't take long but I put them off. A friend's birthday. The insurance man. My kid's teacher. RSVP for a wedding. Deposit a check. Mail my grandma her camera.

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My list goes on.and.on. ugh! Maybe I'm too selfish with the 15 minutes of time each day that don't involve parenting or working. In any event...

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The latest event that makes me want to scratch my own eyes out involves my Life Group. Several months ago the Foxy Mr. committed me to organizing our quarterly service project. (I think he has since learned his lesson.) As much as I love to organize or plan something, I kind of forgot about it for a few weeks. Then for a couple more weeks I thought about it but never did anything about it. (What is with that?) Finally when I broke down and decided to tackle it because the deadline was drawing dangerously near, schedules and dates didn't come together and the organizations with whom I was speaking couldn't accommodate us. So I blew it big time on that one. (The Heineckes may get voted off the Life Group island...)

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This is one of those character flaws I have to surrender to God. For whatever reason, I lack some self-discipline to get little things done that may not be at the top of priority list. I so desperately want to be a person of my word and follow through on things if I make a committment. (Yes, the library is a commitment. to me.)

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Father, remind me that my word is to be trustworthy and give me the wisdom to make good decisions to follow through on things that may seem trivial.

...

Anyone else struggle with putting off small things?

The best popcorn

2008-11-05T20:29:00.000-06:00

Last week was Mad Scientist Day for Kid One.

His science project asked the question, "Which popcorn brand pops the best?"

Being the giver I am, I bought him a wig and helped him paint his face to look like he was in an explosion. I even glued popcorn pieces all over his wig...and then they fell out.

Together we counted EVERY single kernal in the TWELVE bags of popcorn exploding from my microwave. (Each bag had about 400-450 total kernals...who knew.?) At first the buttery aroma made us giddy but by the last bag we were opening the windows and swearing off popcorn forever. (We're over that now.)

Do you know which brand is the best?

I'll tell you.

On average...

Act II pops 88% of the kernals.

Jolly Time pops 88% of the kernals.

Orville Redenbacher pops a whopping 91% of the kernals.

Oh please, hold your applause. We were happy to bring you this public service announcement. Don't say I never gave you anything. Wisdom is priceless.

I voted.

2008-11-04T08:53:00.003-06:00

Did you?

The line, at 7:10 am was long. It took an hour and a half but the Foxy Mr and I managed to do our part to make a difference. How long was your wait?

If you didn't vote yet, GO.DO.IT. ...unless you're voting for Obama and then I think the election is NEXT Tuesday.. ;)

Throw manners out the window, let's eat cake!

2008-11-02T20:01:00.007-06:00

What I wouldn't give to dive into chocolate cake like this.

I'd even lick it off my feet. Yes sir, I would. .....That is, of course, if I could still manage to get my toes all the way up to my mouth! Judging from his tummy hangover, he won't be able to lick those toes for long!

Actually he was a little "easy" on the cake. I kept waiting for him to really get nuts on the cake but knowing how much I dislike a big mess, he showed me some birthday love and kept the destruction to a minimum.

So we called for back up. She Cousin was born 2 days before Kid Three so she showed him how a smash cake is supposed to be "handled."

Thank you Little C. It's good to have mentors.

Tomorrow I will drive Kid Three to kindergarten. That's how fast time is going...

A new twist on the traditional first birthday

2008-10-30T13:31:00.003-06:00

Kid Three is ONE today! That makes me a little sad for a couple of reasons.

1. My baby is growing up and he could be the last baby in this house. could be, I said. Who knows.

2. I've had PLENTY of time to whip my abs into shape but I've squandered 12 months with weak attempts at the gym.

Moving on.

So, Kid Three is one and we're celebrating by having a Time Capsule Birthday! On Saturday, our family will join us for the traditional "smash cake" event and some food. We've asked everyone to bring a gift for Kid Three's SIXTEENTH birthday! That's right, we're going to party like it's 2023. (Let's see Prince sing that.)

I'm really crossing my fingers someone will write an IOU for a car or his college tuition or maybe just a pile of gold - since our cash might not be worth anything by then! yikes!

When Kid Three was born, I bought the Foxy Mr a watch and had "Daddy, 10/30/07" engraved on the clasp. Our contribution to the time capsule is a matching watch with "Son, 10/30/23" on the clasp.

Kid One and Two are making CDs of their favorite songs and also including some favorite books in the stash. I can't wait to see what other people are bringing!

Any other ideas for the Time Capsule Birthday box?

Oh, and it's good to back in Blog World. Welcome home to me.

Control Freak Goes to the Beach

2008-10-21T22:34:00.004-05:00

I'm a control freak.

And for the next six days I'm going to try and control my need to control.

,,,

At 5am on Wednesday the Mr and I are walking out this door with our suitcases in tow -- headed for 5 nights of magic. Well, maybe not magic but I know it won't involve macaroni and cheese or peanut butter and jelly. Enough about that.

,,,

It takes a lot of work to get everyone ready to carry on without me. I've spent the last 3 days organizing, charting, listing, folding, cleaning, and preparing -- all in an effort to control life here in OK while I am exposing my skin to the deathly rays of el sol. Can't wait.

,,,

Checks are written for the sitters.

Daily checklists for the boys are taped to the refrigerator.

Eggs are scrambled and cut up for Kid Three's breakfast.

Thursday's dinner is already precooked.

Laundry. Dishes. Check, check.

Homework done.

Swimsuits are packed.

New book purchased.

Emergency phone list posted.

Passports copied and stored for "just in case."

Medical release forms notarized.

,,,

...and breathe...

,,,

Oh Miss, I don't mean to interrupt your leisure reading in this amazing resort on a gorgeous beach, but I'm wondering if I can bring you another tropical drink?

Why yes, I'll take two.

And can I fluff your lounge chair pillow and get you a fresh towel while I'm up?

Please.

And can I offer you a complimentary full body massage in our spa?

I thought you'd never ask.

I'll have your bed turned down and the bottle of wine brought up to your room.

And the mint on my pillow, Rosario, don't forget the mint.

...

Maybe now that my trip preparations are over I can FINALLY get back to reading your brilliant words.